Baseball Wars Episode I: Undercover Mounds
by Brianna Reiss
Summary: After the destruction of an illegal gambling operation involving baseball, the Galactic Baseball Cartel faces internal troubles, and One Sith involvement is exposed. The Geonosian clans within the Cartel break away from the dark side of the Force, whereas the Neimoidian clans choose to remain loyal to the One Sith.
1. Prologue: The Declaration of Praesitlyn

**Prologue: The Declaration of Praesitlyn**

842 ABY. Ugohr Poof, a Gungan Jedi Padawan, and his Geonosian master, Garam Telso, are in a meditation chamber within the Jedi Temple, waiting for the moment in the wee hours of the morning on that area of Coruscant to get Ugohr's report to the Jedi Council. They were freshly arrived from their raid on Cato Neimoidia's ballpark. The aftermath of the raid required them to fill up the hold of a GR-75 freighter with seized contraband and other evidence, some of which indicting the Sith's involvement in the Cartel and additional evidence pointing to not only illegal gambling operations, but also moneylaundering and contraband. Fortunately for them, the bridge city on which the ballpark was built survived the destruction of the stadium. From the heap of rubble left behind in the wake of the stadium's destruction, they uncovered evidence for the One Sith's involvement in the activities of the Galactic Baseball Cartel. Financial documents, to be exact.

"Master Telso, these accounting documents are the irrefutable proof that the Cartel's money earned through illegal gambling operations were used to fund the One Sith! Theysa must repeal the last ruling forbidding Geonosians and Neimoidians to take part in any mission involving the Galactic Baseball Cartel."

"I know you wish to see the One Sith cut off from their funding, young Padawan. But doing according to your ideas would mean that we will open yet another front in the war between light side and dark side! Our forces are stretched too thin right now to risk overtly supporting the Geonosians in this baseball civil war."

"Wesa discover that the Galactic Baseball Cartel is now facing internal power squabbles; theysa maxibig council is divided between the Neimoidians and the Geonosians. The Neimoidians want to stay with the One Sith, while the Geonosians want to cut free from theysa."

"Unfortunately, the Jedi Council will not allow me to fight the Cartel directly. They are too quick to think I am a liability. At best I would be able to deal with other criminal organizations close to the Cartel while you fight the Cartel itself."

"Mesa await the target and the mission profile before assembling a team to carry out the mission."

Little did they know that the latest HoloNet news story feeds show one of the baseball stadiums being the stage for hostage taking. Garam takes careful records of the newscast story pertaining to that hostage crisis taking place in a baseball stadium. Several Geonosians are standing guard around a Neimoidian Sith Lord held in a containment field, awaiting carbonite freezing. Their leader, Kishuna, a Geonosian with rather lavish markings on his armor, uses the public announcement system of the ballpark where the captured Neimoidian Sith Lord, Darth Tami, is held hostage and every occupant of the stadium is to listen to the proclamation. Of course, very few non-Geonosians would actually understand Geonosian, hence the Geonosian leader speaks in Basic, albeit with a heavy accent. The message of the Geonosian begins to be broadcast across the stadium:

"Baseball fans of the galaxy! Today, the Galactic Baseball Cartel will no longer be subject to the whims of the dark side of the Force! For far too long the Galactic Baseball Cartel, which provided the highest baseball standards in the galaxy for centuries, has been enslaved by the dark side! The cartel will be henceforth providing baseball free of One Sith overlordship! On behalf of the Galactic Baseball Cartel, I wish to thank Ugohr Poof for having exposed the involvement of the One Sith in baseball to the public." Kishuna proclaimed, and Kishuna flies off from the room where the Sith Lord is held.

A short time thereafter, Kishuna makes the ceremonial first pitch. Ugohr watches the scene from the HoloNet room closest to the meditation chamber where he and his master used to be. Just outside the ballpark. a dust storm happened; the ballgame was to proceed nonetheless because the stadium's deflector dome was activated. In attendance there are upwards of 35,000 spectators coming in from all over that world to that location in a desertic region; a few off-worlders, some of which are high rollers, others are just spacers who want to unwind.

"Mesa recognize this ballpark; theysa not on Geonosis! Theysa on Praesitlyn!"

"I sense that the Geonosians within the Galactic Baseball Cartel are getting bolder every day. Now that they have overtly exposed One Sith involvement in baseball, something we had yet to do, we have no choice."


	2. Chapter 1: Target Acquisition

**Chapter 1: Target Acquisition**

The pair of Jedi are brought in front of the Council room. Given what the HoloNet newsfeeds say about the hostages being taken by Geonosian elements of the Galactic Baseball Cartel on Praesitlyn and the One Sith involvement in the Cartel being publicly exposed, the situation has changed. And not for the better. As the pair of Jedi stand at attention in the middle of the High Council chamber, dawn is happening on the area of Coruscant around the Jedi Temple.

"Mesa hear the latest HoloNet reports; Kishuna, the leader of the Geonosian faction of the Galactic Baseball Cartel, declare his faction of the Cartel free from the dark side of the Force, and, by the same occasion, hesa expose the involvement of the One Sith in baseball. In addition, hesa hold a Neimoidian Sith Lord hostage on Praesitlyn. Mesa sense that the Neimoidian clans in the Cartel declare open warfare against the Geonosian clans"

"Most troubling, young Poof. The clouds of battle amass" declared a female Togruta Councillor, visibly concerned by the news brought from Ugohr.

"There are no known Force-sensitive Geonosians in the Cartel" Councillor Krant commented.

"That seems nonsensical from their part that Kishuna can proudly declare his faction of the Galactic Baseball Cartel free from the dark side of the Force when he cannot use it" a winged Gria councillor said before retracting her wings in disbelief. "That said, I propose that Geonosian Jedi can now freely intervene in missions involving the Galactic Baseball Cartel."

Geonosian Jedi? There is only one Geonosian Jedi currently active, and Force-sensitive Geonosians seem to be a curiosity. The probability for a Geonosian to be Force-sensitive is estimated to be in the same range as a victory in the lottery. For this reason, Garam feels targeted when Geonosians are part of the agenda of the Order. That said, Geonosians seem to have little interest in the Force and hence in detecting Force-sensitives.

"The One Sith definitely knows that there is something fishy: one of their key stadiums has been destroyed by Jedi hands, and I can fit right into the Geonosian power structure of baseball"

"The Neimoidian elements within the One Sith strongly suspect that the Geonosians will seek assistance from the Jedi Order. So yes, we will let Geonosians get missions related to the Baseball Cartel" Councillor Krant added.

"They know who to turn to if Kishuna really is sincere in breaking the Cartel away from the dark side of the Force. However, since foul play may still occur, I object and I do not wish Geonosians to be turned to the dark side because of our mistake" Lennart objected.

While the Council endlessly debates the issues and the evidence brought by Ugohr about illegal gambling criminal activities that revolve around baseball, Ugohr and his master are brought out of the Council chamber.

"Geonosians to be allowed to fight the Galactic Baseball Cartel, the Council agrees to. Yet Neimoidians we will still not allow to do so."

"Other stadiums, or facilities, we can attack?" Councillor Krant asked.

"Preliminary information indicates that the Neimoidians seem to concentrate their activities in the Core Worlds and Colonies regions, all the way to the Inner Rim" Lavak, a Jawa Councillor, answered.

"The Galactic Baseball Cartel is notorious to be more active on worlds that aren't densely populated. Take Lorimax for example. It is the site of a baseball training camp under Neimoidian control, yet remains lightly defended, in criminal gang terms" Garam explained.

Nazarie, the Gria long-term Councillor, extended her wings back again. "Baseball players really are pawns in the Neimoidians' hands; I would also ask you to free the enslaved baseball players, while, at the same time, destroying any equipment used for illegal gambling or otherwise specific to the business of committing crimes"

By 842 ABY, the Jedi Council has twelve Councillors, five of which are deemed "lifetime" because they hold their positions until death do them part, four who hold "long-term" positions because, while time-limited, their positions are rather long-lasting (ten years or so) and three more that are "short-term" or, to the non-Jedi, sometimes called "at-will" by analogy with "at-will employment" in the non-Jedi labor world. And, indeed, the average length of service of short-term Councillors over the past five hundred years has been about three years. By now Ugohr is bringing complete baseball equipment as appropriate for a pitcher, including, surprisingly, a bat, as well as a supply of thermal detonators. In contrast, since Garam didn't play baseball at all, he carried no such equipment.

Meanwhile, on Koru Neimoidia, the Neimoidian leadership of the dark side-loyal faction of the Galactic Baseball Cartel, have received news of a crime lord being held hostage by Geonosians on Praesitlyn, which aren't even Force-sensitive to begin with. Darth Tami was one of the key lieutenants, or "C-suite-level" as the chairman of the Cartel would say, and all Neimoidian C-suite-level lieutenants (Darth Tami excluded) are holding an extraordinary meeting in a lavishly decorated boardroom, without any of the Geonosian C-suite-level lieutenants being called into it. The Neimoidian president of the Cartel, a shadowy figure, nevertheless enters the boardroom first.

"Fellow board members, we have a problem. Darth Tami, my apprentice and chief marketing officer of the Cartel, has been abducted by Geonosian elements of the Cartel on Praesitlyn. Kishuna hasn't yet issued the Geonosians' demands for Darth Tami's ransom."

"Why would Darth Tami venture this far out from Neimoidian turf? She is knee-deep within Geonosian territory. We can't rescue her ourselves without risking open warfare against the Geonosian clans" the chief financial officer asked, incredulous about Darth Tami's fate.

"Until this Gungan used his skill as a demolition expert to destroy the stadium on Cato Neimoidia, we had grudging respect towards the Geonosians; whatever respect we then had left for the Geonosians disappeared with the stadium" the chief procurement officer commented. "We can't risk full-scale war against the Geonosian elements in the Cartel; not only they will attempt to hire some Jedi, they will also attempt to bring their droid armies to bear."

"Whereas the Geonosians have us outnumbered on open terrain, that's without counting on our bounty hunters; they are more than a match for battle droids and Jedi. Before this upstart Gungan Jedi meddled in our affairs, we were mostly known for providing the best baseball in the galaxy. Now the public know about our criminal activities" the chief collections officer mentioned.

"How could Kishuna so proudly declare that he would take the Galactic Baseball Cartel off the dark side, when he can't even use the Force? There are no Force-sensitives among the Geonosian C-suite" the president asked. "All units, maximum alert!"

« Surely that Gungan could train Kishuna in the ways of the Force! » the chief human resources officer protested, before being Force-choked by the president.

"I find this statement preposterous: you can't train a Force-user in just a few days to the point where he can independently use it, even on a rudimentary level!"


	3. Chapter 2: Lady of the Basement

**Chapter 2: Lady of the Basement**

Knowing, by now, that they must target the training center on Lorimax, Master Telso and his apprentice, Ugohr, need to go over their plan for the mission as they get their respective spacecraft ready. By now the Jedi Order can allow members skilled in small craft piloting the opportunity to fly a variety of hyperdrive-capable small craft, especially if the ergonomics of said craft seem to cater more to certain species. And rearmed with a grand total of twelve ST6 concussion missiles, four on Garam's Advanced Geonosian Fighter, and eight on Ugohr's N-2. Oh, the Advanced Geonosian Fighter have wider wings so that it can fit two laser cannons rather than one, and have a concussion missile rack underneath the cockpit. And the N-2 differs from older N-1 Naboo Starfighters by virtue of having a hexagonal chassis upon which is attached a tailcone and two engines on the side.

"Incoming transmission from Geonosis", the subspace transmitter warned Ugohr. "Patch it through."

"Welcome to the Galactic Baseball Cartel, Ugohr. Because you have been notified on such short notice, your first contract in the Cartel's service is to fulfill the mission the Order provided you. For payroll reasons, please send the objectives of the mission assigned by the Jedi Order" the payroll specialist on Geonosian employ told Ugohr.

"Destroy the baseball training camp on Lorimax and rescue the enslaved baseball players being trained in the camp."

"Anyone else?"

"Now that the Order gave the authorization for Geonosian Jedi to fight against Neimoidian elements in the cartel, my master should also be included in the payroll"

"Here are the details of your salary: 4,000 credits for each person involved in the mission upfront, plus 500 credits for each baseball player you save from the clutches of the Neimoidians to be shared among the people involved. Plus any applicable bounties on the Cartel officials captured or killed. Minus the cost of equipment."

"Wesa agree on the terms"

The Jedi Code of that era allows Jedi to take missions for hire, so long as the following conditions are met: 1) the Jedi should not be paid more than the going rate for non-Jedi mercenaries for similar missions, and 2) the Jedi should only accept missions for hire so long as the missions either concern the maintenance of peace or require the hunt for dark-sided Force-users that committed crimes. And now Ugohr asked the maintenance droids to paint the thermal detonators the colors of baseballs; he thinks that he can bring thermal detonators into the camp if they are disguised as baseballs. On the other hand, their preparations for takeoff are almost complete. As they prepare for takeoff, they realize that their hyperdrives are really short-ranged, and that Lorimax lies outside the range of the Advanced Geonosian Fighter.

"To any ship bound for the Fakir sector, this is Jedi Master Garam Telso. We are requesting permission to dock."

"Master Telso, this is the _Tiplar_. Permission granted."

Oh, of course, the next bulk cruiser bound for the Palanhi system, along the Namadii Corridor, could do with fighter escorts. As customary, the captain provides a free ticket in return for their services as fighter escorts for the journey. And the _Tiplar_ is, as with many ships doing runs along the Namadii Corridor, configured for both cargo and passengers. The _Tiplar_ could carry, as with all ships of the _Novroski_ -class, five thousand tons of cargo alongside a thousand passengers. Said passengers are carried in a rather luxurious level of comfort, while, unlike other similar transport ships, being equipped with nine retractable Taim & Bak triple-tubed XV13 turbolasers. Understandably, as with all products manufactured by Ringovinda StarYards, _Novroski_ -class ships have ovoid main hulls, with a secondary hull located about two-thirds of the length from the nosecone, containing engines and cargo holds. And the bridge is at the topmost level.

One of the passengers, also due to get off the ship in the Palanhi system, approaches the pair of Jedi and readily recognizes Ugohr. That lady was a Gria, with dragon wings and horns, much like Nazarie back in the Jedi Temple, but is otherwise humanoid in appearance. She also seems to be wearing a green dress which looked very different from the Jedi robes Ugohr and his master wore. Garam did not have nearly as much attention from the Gria lady as Ugohr had.

"Let's introduce ourselves. My name is Charzon"

"Mesa Ugohr Poof."

"Ugohr, you were mentioned by name in the Declaration of Praesitlyn. I think baseball business brought you here."

"Mesa remember yousa; yousa one of the so-called Ladies of the Basement back on Cato Neimoidia"

"Ladies of the Basement? Even if you were referring to us as a group without reference to a particular person, doesn't mean you can call us that just because we worked in the basement of a ballpark tending to the baseball players and their equipment! Besides, I used to be the mascot of the team"

"Ah, the Neimoidians. Theysa not use costumes for mascots. Yousa want to play baseball?"

"I'm a good fit for the outfield, especially centerfield. As a hitter I'm not sure as to my talent however"

"Charzon, yousa play the game almost as a Geonosian batter would. Geonosians really good in the outfield. Neimoidians better in the infield"

"What about you?"

"Mesa better at pitching than at batting. Wesa need some batting practice once on Lorimax"

"Here's the thing: even though we're still far away from the Neimoidian C-suite, we need to assume alternate identities until we can free the baseball players. And destroy the training camp. This is not a mission for battle droids"

"And also yousa need to camouflage thermal detonators as baseballs. Where are the other Ladies of the Basement?"

"You never knew them by their real names. I'm afraid I don't know where they are; they got separated after the stadium's destruction"

"Master, shesa bounty hunter hired by the Geonosians" Ugohr tells his master before turning to Charzon again. "Charzon, hesa Garam Telso"

"Bounty hunter? Come to think of it, my involvement in this business is paid much like a bounty hunter is. And the Geonosians scrambled to get whatever bounty hunters they could, even offering surviving Cartel staff of the Cato Neimoidia attack bounty hunting positions; for what I know the other Ladies of the Basement may be under arrest"

"Just act as your natural baseball playing self, young Padawan. We'll find out soon enough if you're better as a relief pitcher or as a starting pitcher. Your playing style will affect future missions at the Geonosians' employ, if they are still willing to have you work for them. And the same holds true of Charzon; you seem like a capable outfield player but, if you show promise with your throwing arm without having any talent for batting, you may become a pitcher too…"

"It may take some time to gain the trust and respect of the other players. We may have to undertake a battery of tests because we're new players and from species they know so little about"

"One last thing: keep quiet about the Jedi or the Force once you're in the camp. Only use the Force as a last resort"

Of course, there are stark differences between how each species plays at each position. Ugohr touched upon the most obvious differences, which are defensive in nature. But the Neimoidians and the Geonosians came to dominate baseball not simply because they can produce better defensive players in the diamonds; they also show prowess in other areas of the game, although not as notorious as their defensive prowess in the infield and outfield respectively. Probably neither Ugohr nor Charzon would fit a mold of either species. Another baseball fan has eavesdropped in their conversation. That particular Ithorian fan is no more Force-sensitive than Charzon is herself.

"I must admit, Charzon, that I don't know what goes on behind the scenes in baseball very well. What is the Declaration of Praesitlyn about anyway? Did the Declaration affect you at work?"

"Before the Declaration was made, I used to work in the clubhouse on Cato Neimoidia but I wish to say no more about my past as a baseball worker"

"Yousa know about the relationship between the dark side of the Force and the Galactic Baseball Cartel?"

"The Galactic Baseball Cartel is just offering baseball of the highest standard in the galaxy; how could you suggest that the dark side of the Force actually have _anything_ to do with the Cartel?"

"The very words _dark side of the Force_ appeared in the text of the Declaration" Garam added.

The four people argued endlessly over various baseball-related topics for hours at a time, although, understandably, Garam only contributed so long as the topic of discussion was about how the dark side of the Force or the One Sith relate to the Cartel. For topics pertaining to the game itself, the tone is almost as if shouting. The Ithorian baseball fan even went so far as to claim that Ugohr should consider playing at second base or shortstop if he proves a better batter than what Ugohr first claimed. But the Ithorian baseball fan finds the Geonosians' motives to be questionable, especially since Kishuna is known not to be a Force-sensitive being.


	4. Chapter 3: Baseball Camp

**Chapter 3: Baseball camp**

"Are you sure you can trust Charzon? Something doesn't seem right with her. She might have been a clubhouse assistant back on Cato Neimoidia, alongside the _ladies of the basement_ , and hence know the inner workings of the cartel, but how do we know she hasn't been hired as a bounty hunter for the Neimoidians, rather than for the Geonosians?"

"Mesa sense in shesa that the working conditions of the Neimoidians were horrible as far as the clubhouse staff is concerned, or that shesa saw in the attack on the stadium a signal to break away from Neimoidian service"

"We have now arrived in the Palanhi system. Prepare to set course for Lorimax. It would seem suspicious if we dock in the baseball camp's docking bay; not only would it appear suspicious that a baseball prospect can pilot a snubfighter, I would be instantly recognized as Geonosian… and I will stay at a distance unless you're in mortal danger"

"Roger, roger…"

"Once on Lorimax, find a location that isn't too far from the baseball camp and yet would be difficult for the Neimoidians to detect. Please, put on your baseball uniform."

While Ugohr would change clothes from his Jedi robes to a baseball uniform, Garam goes right into the cockpit of his Advanced Geonosian Fighter. Of course, packing up, for Jedi, is rather simple, just that Ugohr has to be ready: a supply of baseballs, a baseball glove, wearing his baseball uniform… and then the pair of Jedi undock from the _Tiplar_ 's hangar bay while the ship has come to a complete stop on the ground. Ugohr wanted to track Charzon until he could ascertain her destination, but Garam didn't seem to trust her as much as Ugohr would.

Once they arrive on Lorimax, after flying for a little more than a parsec, Ugohr scans the area purported to have a baseball training camp operated by the Cartel. It would seem that the ballpark in the files seized from the stadium raid is located in the middle of a corn field. By chance there was some abandoned barn and, indeed, farm, within walking range of the baseball training camp where the duet landed their craft. As for the abandoned farm itself, it has clearly seen better days and could use an occupant for repairs, along with what R9 units the duet brought with them. Yes, the Advanced Geonosian Starfighter did feature an astromech droid socket, unlike their ancestors, the Nantex-class fighter.

"R9, mesa want yousa to stay with the craft"

"Ugohr, may the Force be with you. Play the best baseball you will ever play"

And so Ugohr would carry on his back a bag that would be more appropriate for a batter than for a pitcher, because it is large enough to store baseball bats in addition to gloves, a uniform and a set of baseballs. But clearly a lightsaber is the item with the greatest length he can actually find to be of use, especially at night if he needs to find his way back. Even though a lightsaber hilt is about 30 cm long, it still isn't nearly as long as a baseball bat is. Ugohr walks along a dirt path that is lined up only with corn plantations until he sees a compound lined up with batting cages, each equipped with a pitching machine, and the rows of batting cages are awfully close to the foul lines. To a local countryside resident of Lorimax, the baseball training center would be like a dream for someone who never went to a ball game. But to Ugohr, it wasn't; the sheer number of batting cages lining up the outfield is probably an indication of how many baseball players are expected to be trained in the camp at any one time.

It was a blessing for Ugohr to fall upon a living being; said being is an orphaned Neimoidian standing guard over the main entrance of the baseball training camp's main stadium. But Ugohr had to think of an alternate identity for infiltrating the training camp because using his real identity would make him _persona non grata_ to Neimoidians, especially in the post-Praesitlyn environment, where Ugohr was referred to _by name_ and where he would be moving around with a target on his back as far as Neimoidian-operated baseball facilities are concerned. Yet, by that logic, he also knows that he is welcome on Geonosis or Praesitlyn (or whatever other baseball facilities are operated by the Geonosians) at least until the internal baseball conflict ends. For the time being, he simply had to omit what he knows about the Geonosians.

"State the purpose of your business"

"Mesa Yodel Splee and mesa young Gungan pitcher wishing to undertake the training program"

"A baseball prospect? You are so off-schedule, young Gungan."

"Yousa let me undertake the Combine tests" Ugohr told the Neimoidian sentry while waving his hand and staring coldly at him.

"I will let you undertake the Combine tests"

"Yousa let me visit the training compound"

"I will let you visit the training compound"

The young Gungan gets, thanks to a Jedi mind trick, to visit the training facilities before he undertakes the battery of tests known as the Combine. The first stop in the visit: the front office. Located to the right-hand side of the main entrance, it is the office of the facility's director. Unfortunately, the director wasn't in his office when the mind-tricked guard showed Ugohr around. He is told that he should avoid coming to the front office should he be accepted into the training camp.

"You get only three visits to the front office until you're relegated to maintenance duty. If you end up on maintenance duty, you can kiss goodbye your career as a… forgive me, I forgot what position you're here to train for"

"A pitcher. Mesa still a raw talent, so mesa not know if mesa become a starter, a long reliever, a setup reliever or a closer"

"As I said, if you get relegated to maintenance duty, you can kiss goodbye your career as a pitcher"

"But how do players know whether theysa ready to play at a higher level?"

"I haven't been clear. Players that prove themselves in the camp will be contacted in due time by the director of the facility and they do not count towards the three-visit limit"

To Ugohr it is clear by now that the players invited to the camp live inside a baseball stadium when they are not inside batting cages or out on the many baseball diamonds this facility possesses. On the left-hand side there is the box office, directly across the hall from the director's office. The two clubhouses were linked by cells, each grouped by the playing positions their occupants were groomed for. But that's ground level: he also got shown the basement, which contained a gym, as well as facilities for equipment maintenance and building maintenance.

When the Neimoidian security guard shows the way around the auxiliary baseball diamonds, Ugohr realizes that the baseball diamonds all have the same infield specifications, and the outfields depended on what these training diamonds were being used for. Once it is over, the security guard was called in at the director's office. Unfazed by the Gungan's appearance, he unleashed his anger towards the security guard that shown the way around the compound to the Gungan thanks to a Jedi mind trick.

"Sir, I have a Gungan pitcher prospect that seems highly interested in taking part in the combine tests. He insisted that I walked him through the facilities while on patrol"

"Idiot! You left your station to show that Gungan his way around the camp! Thirty whip lashes for you!" the director ordered before he turns his attention to Ugohr. "As for the Gungan, he will be administered the Combine tests at night. Until then, stay in the main bullpen. His baggage will be kept in the security station" He turns his attention back to the Neimoidian security guard again. "Under _your_ watch, alongside any additional would-be prospects that come until the player curfew."

Ugohr saw that the main bullpen was occupied by people of different species: human, Neimoidian, Chiss, Mirialan to name the species of the occupants at the time Ugohr was placed in the bullpen. Said bullpen could hold six or seven pitchers, about half a team's roster of pitchers, as is standard with Cartel-operated teams, but only five are there at the time, counting Ugohr. The Mirialan male pitcher was the first to approach him, also having noticed him first. The green-skinned teenager began asking questions about him:

"Gungans… it's been a while since I've seen a Gungan at a baseball game. What is your name?"

"Yodel Splee. And yousa?"

"Katzpah. Would you like to pitch some balls with me?"

"Yes"

Katzpah and Ugohr threw baseballs at each other in the dimly-lit room which, as a result, is almost as dark as in a late-night game; they simply pitch as hard as they can while still being able to catch them. Catching the baseballs? Sure, he can do that. And Katzpah recognizes that Ugohr could pitch the ball as hard as he does. And their little pitching game catches the attention of the other teenage players, Neimoidian or otherwise. Especially the Chiss lady, who was the last to realize what was going on between the two pitchers.

"Yodel has the potential to pitch just as well as we can, if not better. But to see whether that is actually the case, we will need to see him in the group drills" the Chiss pitcher commented.

"Or the Combine" added the human pitcher, swiftly going back to pitching afterward.

"Late-night games aren't for everyone. Perhaps he should play in a late-night game if he gets out of here…" the Neimoidian pitcher commented.

"What are all of yousa names?"

"You've already met with Katzpah. I am Jusell, the Neimoidian over there is Gukko and the human is Tisan Aju"

And the five pitchers kept on pitching balls until the lights went out. Oftentimes the balls would bounce out of the walls; catch bouncing balls other players pitch would often do between each pitch they do themselves. They keep at it for many hours. When the security guards open the bullpen's door, almost by nightfall, Ugohr realizes that he is singled out by the cold gaze the guard makes at him, whereas another security guard escorts the other players to the dressing room.

"Yodel, there is visit for you. There is a young lady claiming to be looking for a Gungan pitcher"

"Mesa know who shesa. Charzon; shesa ball girl on Cato Neimoidia. Shesa want to become an outfield player and shesa survive the attack on the stadium"

"Charzon used to be a ball girl on Cato Neimoidia? She'd probably make a good outfielder if she can show some offensive promise, but she has the fundamentals to succeed in a more defensive posture"

Ugohr was closely followed by the Neimoidian guard that is to administer the Combine tests on the two of them. In the Force, Ugohr can see that the Neimoidians had some misgivings about letting them take the Combine tests at night, especially after all regulars at the camp are tucked away in windowless dormitories. Battle droids are taking over for security at night; the Neimoidian guides the baseball players to the main ballpark escorted by two battle droids, with two more battle droids coming in with a radar-equipped pitching machine.


	5. Chapter 4: Baseball Combine

**Chapter 4: Baseball combine**

"Tonight, you will be taking part in an extraordinary session of the Baseball Combine, held at your behest. The first test involves hitting as many home runs as you can; you are entitled to three strikes. If you hit the ball but don't hit a home run, it doesn't count as a strike, unless you hit a foul ball"

"Does that hold even when yousa hit a foul ball after two strikes?"

"Yes, that's the difference between the home run contest and an actual baseball game. Oh and we'll have to do it right-handed first, and left-handed afterward"

Ugohr and Charzon are on-deck waiting for the pitching machine to be positioned on the mound. The Neimoidian security guard puts on the catcher's equipment, and is both catcher and umpire, and then positions himself behind home plate, with an off-hand remote control. As is expected of a late-night administration of the Baseball Combine tests, no one other than the administrators is watching. A coin toss determines who is going for their at-bats first and last. All of the equipment used by the duet is run-of-the-mill equipment used for official games, and the pitching machine is set to pitch balls on command at various speeds, and using various modes.

"Heads it's you, tails it's me" Charzon declared prior to the administrator tossing the coin.

"Tails. At bat: Yodel Splee! Batter up!"

"Hey, batter, batter, batter, batter, hey, batter, batter, batter, batter" Charzon repeatedly howls when Ugohr is at bat. A 25-meter-per-second flyball is thrown Ugohr's way and he hits it, but not for a home run. Charzon takes it out of the ballpark, however.

A sequence of different pitches is being used the remainder of the way: a fastball at 40 meters per second, a breaking ball at 35… the remote control used by the administrator has essentially four buttons: the speed, the pitch type, a fire button and an on-off button. Many base hits, or hits that otherwise didn't amount to much, one foul ball apiece, but after ten pitches on each side, only two strikes are recorded. Charzon is somehow leading two-nothing and, when the eleventh round starts…

"Mesa not get in the way of a Gria youngling" _Use the Force, Ugohr!_ he heard Garam's voice through the Force. _You have held back from using the Force during the Combine!_ While having a forkball thrown his way at 35 meters per second, Ugohr uses the Force to plan for its trajectory and hit the ball as hard as he could; the end result is spectacular in as much as Ugohr batted the home run of his life, as far as his short life as a baseball player is concerned. But Charzon tries the same right after Ugohr comes back to the home plate, without a home run to show for it, much less a home run that is the best of her life. She barely hit a foul ball, and game over at that point. Ugohr was given a twelfth pitch, and hits another foul ball of his own.

"The right-handed winner: Charzon, two to one. Now, on to the second half: the left-handed part"

"But, sir, what about the base hits we managed to hit in the first part?" Charzon asked. "Batting isn't solely about home runs!"

"Yes, Charzon, wesa get runs batted in, or a higher on-base percentage, by doing more than simply hitting home runs!"

"Quiet you two! Look at who is in the bleachers!"

"Katzpah!" Ugohr screamed.

"Play ball!"

Ugohr's first two attempts were foul balls. In contrast, Charzon managed to hit a ball a little past second base, and the second attempt hits Katzpah on the head, good for a home run. As Ugohr gets ready for his third attempt at hitting the ball with his 82-cm-long baseball bat:

"Play ball!" Katzpah screamed from his end of the stadium.

"Katzpah! What are you doing here?"

To that there is no answer, as Ugohr hits the flyball thrown at 35 meters per second. The ball hits Katzpah twice in a row, so he is safe for the time being. But Charzon hits a foul ball, and so did Ugohr again, taking him out with one point apiece. Nevertheless, Charzon proves to be a better left-handed hitter, scoring four home runs before hitting a second foul ball.

"You've disappointed me as a batter. I've expected better from a… erm, from you"

"Mesa no explain it to yousa just yet"

"Alright, Yodel, here's your chance for you to redeem yourself. You were not much of a batter, let's see if you perform any better on the mound! The next event is precision pitching! Play ball!"

The event is rather straightforward: seven targets are placed roughly on a square, with the center and top-center targets being omitted; in a real game, these positions would be tantamount to hitting a batter and hence granting the batter an automatic first base hit. The grid is moved towards the home plate from the main entrance to the playing field, this time without the help of battle droids, who were busy patrolling around the stadium. Here the objective is pretty simple: hit as many targets from the right (and repeat on the left) using seven attempts; hitting the same target more than once will only yield a point the first time. Ugohr throws as naturally as he can from the right hand, knowing that the starting order is decided for all events of the Combine, regardless of the events.

 _If the home run derby featured so many different pitches, as would be realistically in use in a ball game at the level of a first callup, then I should expect quite a bit from the Neimoidian Combine_ , Charzon thought, just before her right-handed turn on the mound begins. Ugohr hit all seven targets from the right, so Charzon knows she is beat from that standpoint, or can at best tie. _The administrator of the Combine should be a good scout_. She is replacing Ugohr at the mound while he gets to recover after pitching seven balls on target. The first two pitches seem to go well for her, since she is hitting the middle targets. But the remaining four balls go awry…

"May the Force be with yousa, even if yousa can't use it! Try a flyball for a change"

Charzon tries her best at pitching a flyball, which bounces off the ground at some distance before hitting the bottom right target; in an actual game, such a pitch would be a ball. But Katzpah, in the distance, is laughing at her because she is made to look like she can't pitch a flyball worth two beans. Nevertheless Katzpah can't be heard laughing in such a diabolical fashion from the mound, even as the left-handed part of the contest begins.

"Play ball!"

As with the right-handed counterpart, the left-handed precision pitching contest is thoroughly lopsided in Ugohr's favor. And, at the same time, Charzon fumbles her way as a left-handed pitcher, failing to hit any target, whereas Ugohr hit four by the time the seventh pitch was to happen. A disheartened Charzon begins to be angry at herself for pitching so wide that she couldn't even hit the outer targets, flyball or no flyball. _What am I doing wrong? Why can't I hit any of these targets?_ she thought while Ugohr throws a curveball, hitting a target that was already hit.

"Perhaps pitching balls from the mound is not natural for me after all; you were correct. You are more suited to become a pitcher than I am. But I must make that one baseball count!"

"Enough chatter, Charzon, PLAY BALL!" the Neimoidian Combine administrator admonished.

Charzon realizes that the energy of despair may not last very long; she seems to be powering up and turning red. With her concentration at maximum, she throws that one pitch, making out the ball's motion to the extent that she could picture that breakball in flight. Said breakball seems to be the best she can do with her left hand for throwing the balls as far as she is concerned. And, while it looks like the ball could miss by a very minimal margin, the administrator heard a bang coming from in front of him, probably because he is positioned behind the target arrays, as if for an at-bat. And the ball hits his right foot soon after the fact.

"I did it! I can pitch left-handed!"

"Oh no, Charzon, the Combine is far from over. Doesn't mean you can't pitch worth two beans on the mound that you can't pitch from the outfield! For the rest of the night, here is the manifest of the remaining events"

"Even though the list of events issa long, the description theysa make of each event issa rather straightforward"

They read the document on a datapad, as the administrator moves the pitching machine away from the on-deck, and the target grid into it. The first two events are stricken off. The next two events are held with the pitching machine on the home plate, with the muzzle height set where one would expect a batter to hit the ball, so as to simulate a batter hitting the ball; hopefully the administrator can rotate the machine after a pitch. Well, in terms of the physics, regardless of whether the ball comes out of home plate at the same angles and velocity by batting it or with a pitching machine, it's almost the same. Ugohr warms up his catching arm, and makes himself comfortable with the glove being handed out by the administrator, after the administrator prepares the pitching machine. At the same time, Charzon is lost in thought when reading off the list of events and their descriptions because the participants have to finish the event in full before another one can undertake it:

* * *

Baseball Training Camp Combine Entry Examination

Event list, Neimoidian Edition

Approved 842 ABY for official use

 **Event 1 (Home run derby).** The objective is to score as many home runs as the player can until three outs occur. What counts as an out: swinging the bat while failing to hit the bat, a foul ball or the ball enters the strike zone when the player doesn't swing the bat. When the ball leaves the fenced area from fair territory, a home run is scored. Any other outcome results in neither a point nor an out.

 **Event 2 (Precision pitching).** The objective is to hit as many of the seven targets as possible using seven balls. The player attempts this first with his/her rightmost hand and repeats the procedure in order from right to left until s/he threw all seven balls with all their hands. Should the player hit the same target more than once, only one point is recorded.

 **Event 3 (Outfield catching).** The objective is to catch three balls launched from home plate, one to the left field, one to center field and the last to right field. Time is kept from the moment the ball exits the pitching machine until the player catches the ball. Players from flying species may fly during the event.

 **Event 4 (Infield catching).** The objective is to catch five balls launched from home plate, one near the third base, one between second and third base, one near second base, one between first and second base and the last near first base. Time is kept from the moment the ball exits the pitching machine until the player catches the ball.

 **Event 5 (Power pitching).** The objective is to pitch the fastest fastball possible. The player is given three attempts per pitching arm, again starting from the rightmost hand to the leftmost hand.

 **Event 6 (Outfield fielding).** The objective is to hit as many player-sized targets at first, second and third base as possible, from left, center and right field. Players are entitled to three balls from each outfield position; they may not leave their outfield zone until all three balls have run out. Players hitting the same target more than once will count for just one hit.

 **Event 7 (Infield fielding).** The objective is to hit as many player-sized targets from first, second and third base, as well as shortstop, at all remaining infield positions. Players are entitled to one ball from each infield position; they are to hit each infield position in order (3B to SS, SS to 2B, 2B to 1B and 1B to P). Once the ball hits the target, the player moves to the target, throws to the next target, until the player reaches first base. Time is kept from the time the ball is pitched from third base, until the ball hits the pitcher.

 **Event 8 (Home run dash).** The objective is to run from home plate to each base, in order (HP to 1B, 1B to 2B, 2B to 3B and 3B back to HP) after the player hits a ball off the tee. Time is kept from the time the ball is hit off the tee until the player returns to the home plate. Players from flying species may not fly during this event.

Decisions to admit or reject players shall be made based on their performance on each event, and if admitted, to be groomed to play the position best suited based on event performance. Some guidelines are available in the appendix. Results from the Combine for a particular player shall be made available to the player in question as soon as a decision has been made regarding that player.

* * *

Understandably, the former ball girl in Neimoidian service cleans house in the outfield catching, and not the least because, as a Gria, she can fly, and Ugohr to be rather adept at power pitching. But more surprisingly, Ugohr and Charzon prove to be pretty even at all things infield, as well as the home run dash, and that Charzon's advantage in outfield catching does not extend as far into outfield fielding.

These eight events are, together, rather taxing on the players. Although it may not provide the best picture of how a player is expected to perform, the Neimoidian Combine offers a rather standardized way to evaluate the skills of a player and determine their suitability for positions. Even though the Geonosians have broken away from the dark-sided elements within the Cartel, whether they come up with their own Combine or simply use the Neimoidian one, or the old one used pre-Praesitlyn, remains to be seen.

"Katzpah! You will sleep in the same bedroom as our new guests tonight!"

In the dead of night, Charzon, Katzpah and Ugohr help the Neimoidian security guard-turned-Combine-administrator store baseball training equipment, like those player-sized targets and the pitching machine, into the training equipment storage room, located next to the home clubhouse. Once the storage of equipment is over, Katzpah is left to sleep on the cold, hard ground at a security station, alongside Ugohr and Charzon, and making all three uncomfortable and sleep poorly.


	6. Chapter 5: Geonosian Power Trip

**Chapter 5: Geonosian power trip**

Part of the Geonosian baseball C-suite has remained on Praesitlyn while the remainder left for Geonosis with all speed. Luckily the local team is on the road, so the area around the baseball stadium is mostly deserted, down to a few maintenance droids, a few battle droids and some flesh-and-blood security guards. The security guards left behind on Praesitlyn to watch over the captured Sith apprentice see a light freighter approaching the baseball stadium where Darth Tami is held. The security guards approach the ship, an antiquated StarSpeeder 3000, land with a shipment of heavy weapons. As they unload the weapons, aided by battle droids, the security guards complete the paperwork.

"I count twelve PLX-2M missile launchers, twenty heavy repeating blasters, seventy-five 3t3 missile magazines" the Geonosian quartermaster counted.

"Thank you for your business. The manifest of weapons is accurate, well-maintained and the shipment is there as ordered" the spacer solemnly stated, after making the count of the weapons shipment delivered to reinforce security in the stadium.

"Now the question of payment"

"As per the invoice, this will run 200,000 credits on delivery for the weapons themselves, shipping and handling included."

"That's a little on the expensive side, but we're going to need more than just battle droids to secure the stadium, especially since the Neimoidians may attack the stadium in force"

At this time, two unconscious teenage girls were found inside the spacer's StarSpeeder 3000 and were picked up by the Geonosian quartermaster, hauled away by the battle droids. To the Geonosian quartermaster, they are stowaways and should be dealt with according to standard security protocol. Said protocol demands that the ship's captain be subject to an interrogation about the stowaway passengers and any applicable crimes to be prosecuted against. And also the stowaway passengers may also be subject to criminal prosecution.

"Halt! You are going with us since your ship has carried stowaways that ended up here on Praesitlyn!"

"I am just a small-time spacer dealing in heavy weapons, why should I have to deal with you?"

"It's the law! You were found in possession of stowaway passengers!" the quartermaster told the spacer, before being surrounded by battle droids.

"You are under arrest! Do not move; you may keep silent. You are entitled to a lawyer. If you do not have one, the courts will assign you one. Anything you may say may be held against you" the battle droid tells the spacer captain, before handcuffing the Rodian spacer.

At the same time, other battle droids bring the stowaway girls, two battle droids per stowaway girl, to the nearest security station before the spacer who shipped the heavy weapons to the Geonosians was brought there. And, as would befit a Geonosian-operated and Geonosian-owned facility, the baseball stadium was built according to Geonosian tastes. As for any medical assistance the stowaways may need, an IM-6 medical droid was activated in the security station, just as the security droids had them lie down on the ground. Once the Geonosian quartermaster arrives with the spacer to the security station, the six battle droids fan out across the security station but otherwise stay close.

"We will let you go if you cooperate and answer truthfully all questions about the stowaways we found in your ship. Do you recognize those young ladies lying on the ground?"

"No."

"Did you notice anything suspicious? Some suspicious crates, or otherwise something wrong in the cargo hold? Or in some other compartment that should normally not contain people for interstellar travel?"

"Nothing of that nature that I noticed."

"Did you have other shipments onboard?"

"I pick up shipments, and your order, while taking up the most space in the ship, wasn't the only shipment onboard"

"Where was it destined for? Where did it come from?"

"The other shipment was supposed to be shipped to Utapau, from Cato Neimoidia"

"There is more to this than it seems" The Geonosian quartermaster turns to the battle droids. "Stand guard while we inspect the suspect's ship; make sure that neither the stowaways nor the suspect escape."

"Roger, roger" the droids reply before the Geonosian quartermaster leaves the station.

For inspecting ships, the Geonosian quartermaster calls upon special battle droids outfitted for searching suspect ships, which, unlike the run-of-the-mill B1 battle droids that were common in Geonosian ballparks, were simply specially-equipped B2 battle droids, which featured not only a vocabulator, but also sensory equipment in their left forearm, in addition to the standard blaster equipment in their right forearm. That model was used by the CIS way back in the Clone Wars for reconnaissance. Upon returning to the security station, after an unsuccessful search of the ship, the Geonosian quartermaster, who also serves as security chief, arrives at the following conclusion:

"It would appear that the shipment bound for Utapau actually contained the stowaways; we found nothing but empty crates bound for that planet! You are now formally charged with trafficking of sentient beings! Kill him at the home plate!"

"But sir! He is just a small-time weapons dealer!" the battle droids protested.

"The stowaway girls are now awake" the medical droids later announced.

"Put the stowaway girls on the mound. Now!"

The convoy marched single file from the security station to the ballpark, with the spacer being in binders, followed by the super battle droids, the stowaway girls, then the regular battle droids and finally, the Geonosian quartermaster. Per the instructions, the spacer was placed at home plate, as if for an at-bat, while the stowaway girls are on the mound, with the super battle droids positioned on it, in front of the stowaways and the Geonosian quartermaster, battle droids on-deck, as well as on first and third base. One more battle droid is positioned between the mound and first base and the last of them stands between the mound and third base.

"Aim at the spacer, FIRE!"

But the poor aim of the battle droids caused the loss of several droids: the left on-deck droid (that is, the on-deck closer to third base) was destroyed by a shot from the "third-baseman" the right on-deck droid destroyed said third baseman, and only the super battle droids on the mound actually amounted to much of anything. This caused the quartermaster to be dissatisfied with what he termed _clankers_ and to question the stowaway girls after the death of the spacer, as well as his identity, is confirmed.

"Where are we?"

"On Praesitlyn. You just witnessed the death of a weapons smuggler"

Of the six B1 battle droids deployed to kill the Rodian spacer, only two survived, those on first and third base. They put the remains of the Rodian spacer in one of the empty crates bound for Utapau for the spacer's family to claim the body, and thus the crate is put in storage. The super battle droids resumed their patrols because the quartermaster no longer needed them to search ships or people.

"We suspect that not only you are stowaways, you are also runaway children! You should return home to Cato Neimoidia!"

"But we have no homes anymore. We were orphaned kids! We lost our homes as collateral damage in an attack on the stadium"

"A-ha! Did you work for Neimoidians?"

"Cato Neimoidia is a Neimoidian purse world; most employers on that planet are going to be Neimoidian!"

"I mean, did you work in baseball? If so, in what capacity?"

"I worked as a batgirl" the Mirial lady answered, in a tiny voice.

"I was responsible for the maintenance of baseball records" the human teenage girl responded. "We are looking for Charzon; she worked with us in the stadium when the attack was carried out"

"Your names please. You may prove to be useful for us, and then you can talk about Charzon"

"Fats Loulan" the Mirial, green-skinned teenager answered, with a hint of exhaustion in her voice.

"Lucy Filewalker. Do you know of a Gria teenage girl called Charzon that used to work at a ballpark on Cato Neimoidia?"

"Charzon? A stadium worker? She survived the attack too? There are very few survivors of the attack that worked there: some maintenance workers, a box office worker, and a few clubhouse workers. Are you interested in playing baseball for yourselves?"

"Ugohr didn't stop calling us the _Ladies of the Basement_ until the attack happened. Plus that attack removed in us all desire we ever had to play baseball"

"Very well. Do you want to become bounty hunters instead?"

"What for?" Fats asked.

"Charzon is now a bounty hunter. You see, for us, bounty hunters serve a lot of different purposes: espionage, commando missions, shock troops. I can assure you the Neimoidians are also on a drive to hire bounty hunters, and not just us. If you want to infiltrate Neimoidian baseball facilities, this is the job for you"

"You don't realize it, Fats, that this may be our chance to find Charzon!"

"I'm too fat to be an effective bounty hunter! Bounty hunting is a job that requires agility; I'm more of a strength girl" Fats spoke, much faster than anyone else in the ballpark at the time.

"You can always fight with a lightsaber or sniper rifle, depending on whether you're more comfortable fighting in close quarters or at range"

"Lightsabers? I'm not Force-sensitive; plus it is a dangerous weapon in the hands of a non-Force-sensitive. Fats may be more the kind of lady to wield a lightsaber, even if she cannot use the Force either" Lucy protested. "I'm a little frail to fight at close quarters; I'll go with the sniper rifle"

"All right, I'll fight with a lightsaber. From what I've seen, there are some similarities between baseball and using lightsabers to fight against blaster-wielders. I can even pass for a Jedi if I'm proficient enough with a lightsaber, albeit a rather fat one"

Mirialan female teenagers are notorious to be sensitive about their looks, especially as puberty comes around the corner. But Fats clearly realizes that one race's fat may be gorgeous to another race. _What if I'm really too fat to be a good bounty hunter?_ she thought, while thinking of the day where she will wield a lightsaber of her own, rather than the training versions that are little more than flashlights. _What if I'm only good to fight with a lightsaber, and nothing else?_ At the same time, the Geonosian quartermaster brings them from the mound to the sanitation station and hands them… discarded broomsticks. Said broomsticks are the length of a fully-extended, standard-length lightsaber, and only a little narrower than a lightsaber blade. But Lucy doubts that the Geonosian quartermaster can actually amount to anything as a lightsaber instructor.

"Let your combat training begin, young ladies! Now you're trainee bounty hunters on the Geonosian payroll!"

 _All I need now is some second-hand Jedi robes_ … Fats thought, as she sparred with these broomsticks, and Lucy is quickly overpowered on their first sparring attempt. But Lucy realizes that she is more comfortable wielding a lightsaber so long as she doesn't swing it as wide as she would need to do if she was at home plate batting baseballs. Then Fats still has the upper hand, when she can take advantage of the weak spot in Lucy's lightsaber style to swing her broomstick wide at that point, and still win that mock duel.


	7. Chapter 6: Baseball Ladder

**Chapter 6: Baseball ladder**

Lorimax, day break. As the players and personnel awaken to the sound of roosters, the baseball complex with scores of baseball diamonds crackles with life. The hundreds of baseball trainees, mostly teenagers, warm up and eat their meals when an exhausted Katzpah tries to finish the scouting report alongside the man who administered the Combine, who is equally exhausted, both having spent an all-nighter administering it and drafting up a report based on it. Once they recover a little bit, most of their coworkers already began their working shifts.

"Now for the reports I have to hand out to the director of the facility in his internal mailbox before the next game, actually before day breaks, about these players" the punished security guard told himself before turning to Katzpah. "Katzpah, wake up! I need your help describing the offensive skills of those players; you were hit by home runs from these people twice!"

"I believe that they can have a 0.500 slugging average, perhaps even 0.600-0.700 in the case of Charzon, in their first few games as callups, or 0.30-0.40 on-base average, but I believe what Yodel says is correct. He himself is a better pitcher than he is a batter, and Charzon is a better outfielder than infielder, let alone pitcher"

"Without question, they should be admitted. The Combine we administer here is there to gauge whether a player can play at the level of a first callup at the bottommost level of the professional baseball ladder, coming in. And also to determine how much training they need at camp before said callup happens. I just found them to be a little impatient, that's all"

"As for when the callups come?"

"Injuries work in mysterious ways and we cannot say for sure. Katzpah, I have to warn you. You have one chance to make it as a pitcher. You have already accumulated two strikes under the punishment system in use, and either you leave the camp to embark on your career or you leave this camp in disgrace, without having played a single inning in the pro leagues!"

"Then, why was my punishment deferred to last night?"

"Post-Praesitlyn, under the new code of conduct, we have no choice but to defer all-night punishments until more than one person in a facility has to serve one"

"Is there a reason for why all people so punished have to serve the punishment in groups?"

"Since I told you that the Declaration of Praesitlyn was the reason for the new code of conduct, it has to do with the Geonosians. The Geonosians basically declared war on us, as well as, more indirectly, the One Sith; the Geonosians may attack us at any time"

Clearly the Neimoidians expect that Geonosians would use guerilla tactics as far as night combat is concerned. But once Katzpah returns to the bullpen for pitching training, Charzon and Ugohr are brought to the clubhouse from the security station. The two newly admitted players are greeted by more experienced players at their favored positions, and presumably the players whose playing style are closest to theirs, at least in the opinion of the security guard.

We therefore see a pitcher and a left fielder, both having spent at least an entire season at the camp. While Ugohr recognizes one of the faces, Jusell, neither of the new players recognizes the other. Clearly the left fielder is neither Mirialan, Chiss, human, Neimoidian, Geonosian, nor Gungan or Gria, much less Togruta, for that matter. With so many different races represented among the roster of baseball players in Neimoidian service, baseball fans can expect just about anything to come up on any given team's roster. Jusell is going first.

"We've already met, Yodel" Jusell says in Ugohr's face, before turning to Charzon. "As for you… what is your name?"

"Charzon. I'm a left fielder"

"My name is Jusell. I am a pitcher, a long reliever to be exact"

The Keldorian left fielder then comes out to introduce himself. "My name is Attis Kataro"

"And mesa thought long relievers were trained and used by Geonosians; theysa use long relievers a lot more often than usen."

"Actually that is only true at the topmost two levels. At lower levels long relievers are more common, and many teams at the bottom of the baseball food chain rely on two pitchers in a game most of the time" Jusell explained.

"I used to be a ball girl on Cato Neimoidia. I never needed to care about the levels of the baseball… food chain other than where Cato Neimoidia was"

"If you want to play baseball as a job, know that there are different levels of play and, with them, salaries. Play well and you'll be playing baseball for decades. Play poorly and you may not even have a future in the working world" Attis warned.

"If wesa use long relievers less often at the topmost two levels, how many levels are there in the professional leagues?"

"There are eight levels. Although I do not wish it on anyone, if you play your entire career at the bottommost two levels, you will be paid just a little more than minimum salary for the entire time, with measly raises every year, even though room and board is provided" Attis explained.

Attis hands out a chart about how the levels interact between one another, as well as the salary ranges. At the topmost level there were sixty-four teams, that is, before Cato Neimoidia folded in the wake of the attack led by Ugohr and Garam (mostly Ugohr because he was the one who planted the charges). To baseball fans, the levels are usually known, from top to bottom, as the Major League, AAA, AA, A, B, C, D and Rookie. But for regulatory purposes, said levels are denoted by Roman numerals, I to VIII respectively.

"Are the odds different for a pitcher than for a batter?" Charzon asked.

"That is a little peculiar. Although at all levels, there is a grand total of twenty-five players on the active roster at any time, low-level teams tend to carry more batters and less pitchers, and at the top level, the one called the major league by baseball fans of the galaxy, the standard is twelve pitchers for thirteen batters" Jusell explains, before Attis takes over.

"In other words, it's statistically easier for a pitcher to make it to the top once they go pro, and not the least because a starter in a lower-level league can be a long reliever, set-up man or closer in the higher-level league. For a batter, luck plays a greater role and it becomes increasingly difficult to move up because teams want to move around players while taking into account their positional needs. It is entirely possible that your first callup be at right field, Charzon, and at the D and Rookie levels, right fielders are often outfielders that may be struggling defensively, but who excel offensively"

"Be lucky that you are playing for the Neimoidians, Charzon; the Geonosians are simply L-O-A-D-E-D in the outfield"

"Why issa, on oursa first day in the camp, wesa forced to be lectured about the hierarchy of the leagues and what issa take to move up?"

"For everyone here that makes it to the pros, their first stop will always be a D or a Rookie-level team. No one I knew here played at the C-level or above right out of camp"

"But even the information provided by the two players is far from the end of the story. Post-Praesitlyn, the numbers in the chart I just gave you are subject to change, and will most likely go down, so you have to work that much harder to climb the ladder of professional baseball"

"How many camps supply the talent for the D and Rookie-level teams?"

"About a hundred fifty camps or so"

"Do not plan on staying in camp for more than a standard year" Jusell warned.

"There is an operational reason why the Combine administrators set the simulated pitching and exit speeds to be similar to that of D and Rookie-level players. This camp supplies players to four to six Rookie-level teams and equally many D-level squads" Attis added.

According to the chart given out by Attis, there are over five hundred teams each at the D and Rookie levels, 350 at the C level, 280 at the B level, 230 at the A level, 180 at the AA level and 128 at the AAA level with, of course, 63 teams at the major league level. But even the explanations given by Attis about the odds of making it to the top level are, let's face it, incomplete. True, a pitcher is more versatile, but it's also a question of who gets injured more often and when. To that Ugohr is trying to get that addressed:

"Mesa like to add on something said earlier. When yousa said that it may be easier for a pitcher, yousa not take into account the injuries at each position"

"Oh that. Other than at the major-league level, where they are more lenient about injuries, so long as you are good enough, the seven levels known as the minor leagues will usually force a player to retire in this capacity after three severe injuries necessitating more than thirty days of rehabilitation at the same level, pitching is more injury-prone than batting."

"I have another question: are there teams that prefer to recruit, or recruit exclusively, from here?"

"The answer depends on the position. But as Attis told you earlier, Charzon, since you play outfield, roughly half the teams will be _de facto_ off-limits to you if you only want that"

"Because the Geonosians run these teams, and Geonosians tend to severely constrain outfield positions to non-Geonosians, except perhaps at the major league level. It seems that speciesism is most acute for outfielders on the Geonosians' part than anywhere else in baseball"

"Off the top of my head for pitchers, one would say that, although four to six teams each at the D and Rookie levels seem, in any given year, to ask for players regularly at all positions, pitchers can go as far as Ipelrilla or Aargau…"

At this time, the director of the facility enters the clubhouse where Jusell and Attis seem to be endlessly lecturing the new players about the baseball hierarchy, as well as what will influence their lot from the here on out, beyond just their own play. The Neimoidians seem to think that neither talent nor luck is, in itself, sufficient. He seems to be pointing fingers at Jusell; the Chiss lady was to be taken out of the clubhouse. Jusell moves towards the Neimoidian director when the latter explains the situation after bringing in Katzpah into the room.

"Now, if you may excuse me, Jusell has just received her callup to the next level. She is to play as a pitcher for the Iyuta HVACs. For the next segment of the introductory training, Katzpah will be right there"

"It seems that I'm getting passed over once again" Katzpah commented, while being outraged, before turning towards the newcomers he dealt with all night. "If I may continue from where Jusell left off, for outfielders like you, you may find that left or center fielders produced here are favorites of Vakkar or Tharin-based teams"

"Play ball!"

"The ten commandments of the Neimoidian Baseball League…"

"Neimoidian Baseball League? Issa how the Neimoidians call theirsa part of the Galactic Baseball Cartel post-Praesitlyn?"

"The Ten Commandments of the Neimoidian Baseball League are the first ten articles of the code of conduct that applies to you from the time you were first accepted here" Katzpah lectures them while they hand out the first ten articles of the Code of Conduct.

Neimoidian Baseball League Player Code of Conduct

Approved 842 ABY for official use

Players shall obey all lawful orders from officials, coaches and management.

Players shall respect curfew except in circumstances where it's otherwise impossible to respect curfew

Players shall behave in sportsmanlike fashion at all times

Players shall be respectful of fans, other players, coaches and management at all times

Players shall keep track of their equipment and their belongings. The Neimoidian Baseball League IS NOT responsible for lost items.

Players found in violation of any article of the present Code shall be punished at the first possible occasion. The first two violations at a given level of play shall be punished in accordance to the violation committed as well as its gravity. On the third violation, the player is barred from play at the level at which the violations were committed for life.

Punishments that require the violator to spend a sleepless night shall not be meted out until two or more people in the same facility or team have to serve such a punishment

Players have three standard days after a disciplinary decision is made to file an appeal

Players shall report any violations of the Code as soon as possible

Players shall report any problems to the appropriate authority as soon as possible

After wading through these tedious documents, the new players are shown their new rooms as well as their lockers and their respective combinations. Katzpah and Ugohr are led into one of the peripheral bullpens with one of the pitching coaches, whereas Charzon is led into a batting cage on the left-hand side of the main stadium. Of course, since so much of the activities of the baseball camp depend on the weather, they are left wondering about what happens when it rains outside, other than just wait on the batting cages because the batting cages are weather-proof.


	8. Chapter 7: Dangerous Wagers

**Chapter 7: Dangerous wagers**

About a week elapse and, because it has been raining outside all day, the coaches at camp couldn't do all the drills they wanted out of the players, especially not the drills out in the diamonds. After all this time training in various baseball drills, as well as in pitching and batting, and conditioning, it is understandable that the players are weary after all this time. Of course, Katzpah still hasn't been called up yet, and he follows Ugohr outside the main stadium, in a tavern that looks a little antiquated but whose equipment isn't. The three of them brave the rain to go to the tavern.

"I think it might be best to talk about this plan away from the training camp. Yodel has something to say about the whole reason why we are in camp in the first place"

"Charzon is correct. We do not want to arouse any suspicion on the Neimoidians' part"

"Good. Yousa not forget what wesa here for?"

When they arrive at the tavern, which looks rather primitive from the outside, Ugohr immediately spots, among the patrons of the tavern, a Geonosian who, even without the Jedi robes he'd usually wear, could be recognized instantly by his apprentice. These people seem to be busy watching baseball games from across the galaxy, but they seem focused on the Iyuta-Tharin game, which is about to begin about half an hour from now. Garam is reviewing the pitching decisions, as well as other gameday information. But, because the tavern is on a planet lost in the middle of nowhere, it's a spot that many of their patrons choose for it being away from any law enforcement authorities or otherwise away from prying eyes.

"Jusell is going to _start_ that game?" Garam asked, surprised by it all.

"Why don't you wager on any of the Praesitlyn or Geonosis games, you Geonosian scum?" a Zabrak spacer told Garam in his face.

"I have my reasons. Major-league wagers are usually less profitable than minor-league wagers, and the most profitable of them, but also the riskiest, are to be found at the D and Rookie levels"

"I know Jusell, it's going to be her first start as a professional. We're going to wager a whole spate of different wagers to catch the bookmaker off-guard. Quick before these wagers become active" Katzpah comments, before placing his first bet.

"Whosa going to bankroll usen?" Ugohr asks.

"Some of the items seized from the Neimoidian Baseball League were auctioned off after the League committed crimes. Their proceeds were made available to us and this is going to be our bankroll for the entire mission, including today."

"The Neimoidian Baseball League, a criminal element? How dare you accuse the Neimoidians of criminal activities!" the Zabrak spacer told Garam, in his anger, shoving him as well as pointing a blaster in his direction.

"Geonosians are destroying baseball!" another Quarren spacer accuses Garam of doing.

"Please enjoy the wagers you made for they will be the last" another Jawa told him.

"We have to do something! We can't let them lay a hand on him!" Charzon realized.

"Hesa betten on Neimoidian baseball games!"

"What did you say?" the Zabrak spacer asked, astonished at Ugohr's demand.

"We're unarmed baseball players!" Charzon protested.

"What do we have here? A Gungan and a Gria! They are rare beasts!" the Zygerrian slaver wryly comments about Ugohr and Charzon, while binding the two into shackles. "Geonosians and Mirialans are worthless, however. Far too common to be worth the cost of hauling back to Paladru Lake on Zygerria"

"R9! Come here, we need your help!" Garam shouted through his comlink.

The three people being in shackles bought Katzpah some time to finish the wagers in the names of all four of them. Of course, since Garam is bankrolling the entire operation, most wagers will be made in his name. Among them are: Jusell will give up at least three runs, as well as three bases-on-balls or walks, but somehow last seven innings or more, and also that Iyuta being the underdog for that game, at +140 for money line purposes. However, both Praesitlyn and Geonosis are, per money line standards of the day, highly unprofitable: they are both at -200 or more. As a final act, spending the last 1,500 credits on the bankroll, Katzpah decides that one of Praesitlyn or Geonosis (doesn't matter which one so long as one of these teams meet the condition) will win with the mercy rule invoked. With the rather lengthy manifest of wagers made, it would seem that the bulk of the money was wagered on the game Jusell is about to play.

But the barman, also a bookmaker, prints the list of all the wagers made by the client so that the client knows what he wagered on, how much, as well as the odds. Once the tab is printed, Katzpah flashes Garam's tab in front of the Zabrak spacer. It seems that the Zabrak spacer finds something suspicious on the tab being flashed in front of him. Each wager takes up multiple lines on the invoice, which is split by the chronological order of the items being bet on, as well as a description of the type, and the options on the wagers.

"This is the wagering tab of the Geonosian!"

"See? The Geonosian has wagered on Geonosian games, too!" the Zabrak spacer exclaims before he turns to the other spacers.

"The Gungan! Bind the Gungan and the Geonosian; they are worth a lot to the Neimoidians and we will get bounties so large we can buy our own baseball team!" the Quarren ordered.

"Or a droid army all to ourselves" the Jawa commented.

"Surely this is a mistake! These aren't the Jedi you're looking for!" the barman shouted from behind the counter. "Jedi wouldn't wager dozens of thousands of credits! On minor-league baseball no less!"

The spacers bind and gag the three people in different corners of the tavern: Ugohr close to the terrace, who is opposite the stadium, Charzon is closer to the bar's counter but nonetheless opposite the stadium, and Garam at the other end of the counter. Only Katzpah isn't bound for some reason. But the violence of the spacers towards the baseball players only increase as Katzpah is cornered. The minor-league baseball game is about to begin, when the Zabrak and the Quarren follow the Jawa into the remaining corner of the tavern. When, at this time, R9 arrives…

"This is the end for you, little pitcher! You and your Jedi friends will die!"

"Even if they were the Jedi you were looking for, they are of more value to you alive than dead!"

At this point, R9 opens the hatch and launches a lightsaber in Katzpah's direction. As soon he sees the lightsaber's direction, he is diving for it, but the Jawa is pointing his ion pistol in his direction to prevent the lightsaber from being useable. The Jawa missed his shot at point-blank range, instead hitting Katzpah's left arm as he reaches for the lightsaber with his right arm. And everyone is racing towards the lightsaber, even though, of course, the Zabrak and the Quarren would have to get underneath a crawling Katzpah and a Jawa to get to it. Once Katzpah gets a hold of the lightsaber, the other three fall back to draw their concealed weapons.

"Where did the pitcher learn to use a lightsaber?" the Jawa asked in horror, before his throat gets slit by a rather wild lightsaber swing.

The other three shot blasters at Katzpah, who did his best to evade the shots and hit what other shots he could, using a combination of dives and baseball jumps to either avoid or deflect blaster bolts with the green blade of his lightsaber. However, he couldn't direct the blaster bolts at other people; what blaster bolts were bounced off Katzpah's lightsaber ended up all over the place: broken windows, holes punched inside the tables, broken alcohol bottles, burnt spots on the walls and the floor… failing to hit any of the three spacers still alive. At the same time, R9 is removing the binders off Garam, then Ugohr and finally, Charzon, with a lightsaber being thrown at each of them once they are freed.

But because the spacers were retreating behind the tavern, they also had to evade the blaster bolts being bounced back at them by lightsaber action. Of course, the impact of blaster bolts with all these items transforms some of the items to smoke, especially the content of the alcohol bottles. When the smoke clears, for the first time in their lives the people that were gagged and bound by the spacers look at what is underneath a Jawa's hood. The horrible image of a dead black rat with yellow eyes is reeling before them before the next phase of the operation begins.

"The Jawa has been killed; if they can kill the rat, they can kill all of us too!" the Zabrak spacer told the other two survivors.

"Activate the battle droids!"

"No use; there are two Jedi in the tavern! They will kill us all, clankers or no clankers!"

"To think we could have had enough money to buy thousands of battle droids if we brought back the Jedi to Neimoidia… this insolent droid wrecked everything!"

Meanwhile, inside the tavern, which has been absolutely trashed by the fight between the spacers and the batter, the foursome regroups and ignites their lightsabers. Of course, Garam and Ugohr could recognize their lightsabers instantly, even when their blades are not active (being yellow and blue respectively), but Charzon and Katzpah are somehow given lightsabers of their own. At the same time, Garam gives Ugohr a special baseball, which only looks like a baseball from the outside. They use the emergency exit to catch the spacers outside the tavern, where Ugohr is about to throw that particular baseball, which is to surprise the hostile spacers before they leave the planet.

"Now before they can get away!" Garam ordered Ugohr.

"Disa baseball will give them-sa mui surprises to thesa nutsen spacers!"

Ugohr threw the baseball right into the dorsal hatch of the XS-1500 light freighter but the baseball did not stop until it hit a passenger seat in the middle of the ship, at which point the occupants of the ship fell asleep. But neither Ugohr nor Garam enter the ship to kill off the occupants. Charzon charges through the tavern's landing pad, with her pink-purple lightsaber shut down, flying and then entering the ship through that very dorsal hatch the Nytinite-loaded baseball entered the ship in the first place. Because it's raining outside, she makes sure the dorsal hatch is sealed shut before taking any further action on the ship.

While she locates the sleeping spacers, she finds a common space inside the cargo hold to pile them up, ensuring that the necks are aligned one another. Of course, the Quarren, being the tallest of the gang, lies at the bottom, and she has to drag each body across the floor while they are in a deep slumber as a result of the trapped baseball's effect. Understandably, she becomes increasingly tired with each body being dragged around, and the Zabrak comes second, the Zygerrian lady comes last. Once the bodies are well-aligned and are located where they should be, Charzon ignites her pink-purple lightsaber and, in one quick motion, the top two heads roll across the cargo hold, but the Quarren's doesn't. Nevertheless, the Quarren dies just as fast as the others.

Ugohr enters the ship through the ventral airlock, which leads him to the passenger cabin, which also serves as crew quarters. He finds a filing cabinet, which has seen better days, and opens the cabinet drawers, starting from the bottom. What he finds is that the bottom drawer contains thermal detonators, the one above it contains a supply of datapads and other utility tools, When he arrives at the top drawer, he reads through the ship's documents, the manifest of their occupants on the inside of the cabinet's top drawer:

"Master Telso, look!"

"What do we have here?"

"Wesa have proof dat the people who gagged us earlier were Neimoidian bounty hunters. Theysa use da crest of the Neimoidian Baseball League on the cockpit's door"

"Contact the Geonosian headquarters at once. Use the restricted channel"

"Disen Ugohr. Wesa capture da skeebeetle of a Neimoidian gang of bounty hunters"

"The status of the bounty hunters?"

"Killed. Daree isa a Jawa male, Izmir, a Quarren male, Karka Dann, a Zygerrian female, Idriss and a Zabrak male, Paleesh"

"These bounty hunters are actually the elite of the security detail of the Neimoidian camp you are there to destroy. Anything else you've learned?"

"The Neimoidians claimed to have placed a maxibig bounty on mesa allowen someone dat captures mesa to buy a baseball team! Also, theysa allied with Zygerrian slavers."

"We cannot afford to fight both the Neimoidian Baseball League and the Zygerrian slavers at the same time. The local bookmaker. Is he still alive? Or captured?"

"No. Issa best to wait until our wagers are resolved. Wesa can maken the Neimoidians lose muy mula"

"We won't pay you until action is taken regarding the bookmaker."


	9. Chapter 8: Surrender of the Book

**Chapter 8: Surrender of the Book**

Now that the dead bounty hunters on the Neimoidian payroll are held inside individual, improvised coffins made out of and where each body is cut into pieces so as to fit each crate. It's admittedly easier to do on the Jawa, who was not only much smaller than the other three, was also found to have a vocal cord implant. The other three bounty hunters on the Neimoidian payroll were much taller and had to be cut into more pieces to fit into the empty crates, as per Gria funeral traditions. Nevertheless, they still have to watch some baseball games around a cup of mead. And some pub grub.

"It's the Geonosians! We are under attack! The Geonosians trashed this place and caused damage to the equipment!"

"No, we still have wagers active. Until the last of our wagers is resolved, we mean you no harm"

"Now, what is it with you and… Jusell? How many pitchers, in their first professional start, pitch seven or more innings, despite giving up three bases-on-balls or intentional walks and three runs? And, with such a pitching performance, Iyuta still wins? "

"Just hope for the best. These are long shots, and this is the kind of wagers we mean when someone says that it is risky but can turn out to be lucrative. Luckily I still had a safety net in Praesitlyn and Geonosis, valued at -200 and -240 respectively for today's money line bets"

A negative money line means that one needs to bankroll that amount of credits, to make a profit of 100 credits in the event of victory, whereas a positive money line means that one can make that amount of profit per 100 credits wagered. Usually positive (or negative) money lines used for bookmaking take values greater or equal to 100. Yes, Praesitlyn and Geonosis are dominant powers in the galactic baseball scene, and Geonosis has the distinction of being the only planet in the galaxy to possess a baseball team at all eight professional levels. But the majority of the wagers made on professional baseball with Geonosian teams in the galactic circuits concern the major-league level team. In contrast, Neimoidia only had four professional teams.

"That was the Gungan's idea to make such risky bets; he is a new hire in my employ and a munitions expert; I am…"

"Garam Telso. There are so many Geonosians, the possibility of duplicates is just too high"

"May the Force be with usen"

After reading through Garam's wagering tab, Ugohr realizes that the wagers he planned on doing with the bankroll the Order provided them may set back the Order quite a lot of money. But, if the largest wagers prove victorious, it would be an astounding success, and then it would be the Neimoidians that would be set back some. Wagering on the mercy rule being invoked in one of the games involving Praesitlyn or Geonosis, regardless of which one, was not even the one with the most potential for profit. The odds are pretty long, all right, 66 to 1, combined to the money line wagering on the games themselves. But, while no other individual wager is otherwise that long, accumulators prolong the odds since the composite odds are the product of the individual odds.

"Your Gungan employee is the most reckless gambler I've met in my lifetime. Betting accumulators based on homestands is already risky enough"

"Mesa was once a baseball pitcher prospect. Mesa not a sabermetrician"

"This is just crazy! You had us wager on accumulators so obscure that not even the most experienced professional gamblers even try doing!" Garam admonished.

"Issa dere something wrong with my methods of betting? If yousa get expelled from the training camp, yousa can still become a bounty hunter for the Geonosians, and wesa can then gamble all wesa want"

"It's not my fault that Neimoidian bookmakers treat conditional bets as accumulator bets!" Katzpah lamented.

"Each condition you set in a bet is an additional risk you take, young Padawan"

Accumulator bets are common when betting on doubleheaders or entire homestands at a time, where one bets on the outcome of as many as four games at once. For the accumulator to be victorious, _all_ the selections must be victorious, which makes it a highly risky, but a high-potential betting option for the more adventurous bettors, since the payout rate of the accumulator is the product of all the individual payout rates. Ugohr is forced to examine all the wagers they made prior to their run-in with the Neimoidian bounty hunters as he watches the Iyuta-Tharin baseball game, alongside his master, whereas Katzpah and Charzon watch the Praesitlyn-Muunilinst and Geonosis-Christophsis games respectively.

"Look at these accumulators!" You split the bankroll in five accumulators, with rather outlandish conditions attached to each of them! No wonder the bookmaker's tab was so long"

But none of these accumulators had more than four components to it. The accumulator that the Neimoidian bookmaker qualified of reckless is one of those four-part accumulators, thanks to it being a conditional wager: Iyuta wins under money line conditions (meaning outright victory or losing by one run) with a payout factor of 2.4, Jusell pitches seven innings or more (the odds being 20-to-1), her giving up three base-on-balls or more during her presence on the mound is given 10-to-1 odds, and three runs or more is even. Should that particular accumulator be victorious, that's more than a thousand times the original wager that they stand to win, with an initial bankroll of 10,000 credits. Only the Praesitlyn win under the money line rule didn't end up being an accumulator.

"So you wagered that Tharin would score three or more runs in a single inning, first through eighth inning inclusive?"

"Yesa. Mesa also bet on Tharin and Iyuta having una double play each, and these dee events all happen in different innings."

Meanwhile, in the Ysanne Isard Park on Iyuta, the game, held in front of some 3,780 fans, is at the top of the third inning, Iyuta leading 1-0. Jusell just gave up a base-on-balls and the first base is therefore loaded. She pitches a good breaking ball and the batter garners a strike. But the second pitch, a curveball, is hit by the Neimoidian right fielder at the same time as the Tharin human first baseman advances to second base. Yet the Neimoidian hit is caught by the shortstop, throwing it to the Iyuta second baseman, taking the human runner out and the Neimoidian player who just hit attempts to slide to first base, but the opposing first baseman catches the ball before the Neimoidian could reach first base, taking both players out of the play.

"Well, looks like Iyuta got their double play… protecting their precious 1-0 lead in the process"

"With all due respect, that last accumulator was just moronic. Wagering 5,000 credits on foul balls and a double error on Tharin's part? You wagered that Tharin would get at least a dozen foul balls in the first three innings, but that the double error may occur at any time in the game. Yet Tharin already has two outs this inning, and they only hit six foul balls"

Even though the rules allow hitters to hit as many foul balls as they can so long as they do not get extra strikes after the second foul ball, earn a base hit or four balls, Ugohr believes it is nearly impossible to hit six foul balls before either of these conditions are met. He did manage, however, to get as many as four foul balls under the same stipulations in batting practice, but six would elude him as a batter. After all, he is a pitcher and batting is not a pitcher's cup of tea. But he had to endure batting practice since neither the Neimoidians nor the Geonosians use designated hitters, unlike some amateur and semipro leagues.

With two outs, the Togruta catcher in Tharin's uniform steps up to the plate, and, while unaware that one of the bettors on Lorimax depends on her hitting six foul balls, she tries doing it anyway, since her team's strategy would involve raising pitch count. But after hitting what looks like a third foul ball, she runs to first base as fast as she can and the third baseman runs up to the foul line fence to catch the ball in fair territory, leading to her being out.

"Mesa admit defeat on dat accumulator. But thersa still una extra accumulator active: Iyuta would score at most sevin runs, hit at least twenska foul balls and batting one home run with at least one runner on the bases."

"Why does betting have to be so complicated with you?"

"Accumulators are part of what maken betting fun!"

"Very few clients would actually bet on such nonsensically specific accumulators!"

At the same time, Ugohr orders some fried fish platter that is native to this planet, which also contained some fries. The plate upon which said platter, ordered at the end of the third inning, arrives to them on a home plate-shaped plate due to it having been ordered "family-sized". It arrives to them by the bottom of the fifth inning, where Jusell shows up for her at-bat. Her lack of batting skill makes it so that she hopes for the best, pulling the ball to the right, forcing the second baseman to tag Jusell's own teammate on second base and she was a little slow in reaching first base, being victim of an out. Thus far, Jusell cost her team two outs, but Ugohr is happy because another of the conditions in his accumulators is met, that is, Tharin getting a double play. But the gang watch their respective baseball games on the tavern's holoscreens.

"Mesa find bombad fish! Better than what theysa serve at camp"

"I always forget how much Gungans like their fish, fried or not"

"In general, species that live underwater on their home worlds will appreciate fish from other worlds so long as they're compatible with their physiology"

Two innings later, Geonosis leads Christophsis 19-0, and this is the bottom of the seventh inning. To the best of their knowledge, both baseball leagues invoke the mercy rule when teams are ahead by 15 runs or more after 6 1/2 innings (if the home team is winning) or 7 innings (if the away team is winning). Ugohr is carefully watching the action on the screen displaying the Geonosis-Christophsis game while, at the same time, being on the lookout for Jusell on the Iyuta-Tharin game.

"One of your accumulators involved the invocation of the mercy rule? Because, right now, Geonosis is blowing out puny Christophsis! And on the road, no less!"

"Charzon, at least we won this accumulator. And we made a profit!"

"Wesa just win a hundred thousand!" Now wesa at least sixty grand richer!"

"Puny little Gungan, I'm not paying you until all games on the tab are over. Praesitlyn is winning, mind you, just not by 15 runs"

That condition posed made it different from a regular accumulator: when betting on more than one game, but the outcome of the second bet is conditional to only one of the games being bet on among a group of games, it is not treated as a regular accumulator, which is, from a logical standpoint, strictly required to be an "AND" for it to work as such. The foursome seems very happy to be watching the remaining baseball game on which the other three accumulators are still active.

Meanwhile, on Iyuta, at the top of the eighth inning, Jusell is _still_ on the mound, her team being ahead 5-0, after scoring two runs in the sixth inning, thanks to a home run with a runner on second base, and two more in the seventh. The female Chiss is getting the manager to the mound to review the strategy while other players on both teams, especially the Tharin players, seem to grow impatient, as Jusell signifies that she is still just fine to pitch the eighth inning. The crowd seem to be enthralled by her style of play, even though she is still a rookie; the objective at the rookie level is not necessarily to win games so much as it is about players honing their skills. But clearly something is wrong with her, after seven innings of decent pitching (other than two base-on-balls, she gave up no runs, and four base hits), the hits begin to accumulate. She proves unable to prevent base hits, and ends up giving up a third base-on-balls when the opposing pitcher fails to swing the bat for the fourth time.

"The next batter better hit a home run; that will take shesa out of the game, and it looks like hersa pitching has decreased over the last inning"

"HOME RUN!" Charzon screamed, when the Neimoidian batter hits a home run.

After the home run ends, Jusell is, understandably, taken out of play, and a happy Ugohr starts counting the money and what he will do with it. Three of the four conditions of his _idiotic_ accumulator are met, and he prays that the Twi'lek closer will record a save. Even though he never explicitly bet on who is going to close, or whether the closer is going to save the game, betting on Iyuta winning is, under these circumstances, coterminous with betting on the closer recording a save, now that the game is 5-4 rather than 5-0. But, by the bottom of the eighth inning, the batter designated to substitute for Jusell in the batting order keeps hitting foul balls, much to the delight of the fans but also much to their displeasure. He ends up costing his team an out after he gets caught stealing a base afterward.

"I hope for your sake that both Praesitlyn and Iyuta win, now that Iyuta's twentieth foul ball has been hit!"

One scoreless inning later in both games, Ugohr stands face-to-face in front of the bookmaker that took, in his opinion, the monstrously ridiculous accumulator bets after the content of the wagers are resolved. He is making an invoice to the Neimoidian Baseball League for the amount the Gungan high roller just won, which is rather staggering by the standards of a planet whose relationship to baseball is limited to that of being home to a training camp, not even having so much as a rookie-level team.

"What do wesa have hair?"

"One lost accumulator, two individual wagers won (3,500 credits apiece), as well as four accumulator bets" The Neimoidian bookmaker calculates the amounts of money being owed to Ugohr in the wake of this nightmarish night.

Over eleven million credits were owed to Ugohr for wagering on Jusell's performance during these eight innings (but statistically counted for only seven), and, in comparison, chump change on the major-league games. And the accumulator predicated on foul balls hit by the HVACs had approximately a 1-in-250 chance to be victorious, with 6,500 credits on it. The last accumulator that contained double plays also had 10,000 credits bet on it, with composite odds that are almost as long, if not more so, than wagering on Jusell. The Gungan laughed as hard as he could, in a demonic fashion. "Yousa lose! Now, pay up!"

"Sir, the Galactic Baseball Cartel demands your surrender! If you swear never again to run bookmaking businesses and never again to work for a baseball league in any capacity, your life will be spared"

"These losses are horrible! I have been horribly unlucky today! Please, spare my life!" the Neimoidian bookmaker begs, on his knees. "After my cut for damages to the facility has been taken, there is still 25 million in outstanding balance!"

Ugohr stares at the Neimoidian bookmaker blankly. "Yousa will bill da league for dis"

"I will bill the league for this"

The Neimoidian bookmaker finishes the invoice to the Neimoidian Baseball League head office on Neimoidia. Being down on his luck, the "mom-and-pop" bookmaker operator realizes that he was overconfident that he would win some credits, maybe not the full 40,000 credit bankroll, but some nonetheless. But 25 million was clearly way out of his league as a bookmaker and he exhausted all his financial ammunition in an attempt to pay out Ugohr's winnings.

"Yousa under arrest under the charge of illegal operation of a gambling business! Yousa have the right to stay silent, If yousa not have a lawyer, the courts will give yousa una. Anything yousa may spake may be held against yousa"

"Why is it that it's always bankrupt bookmakers that get caught?" the former Neimoidian bar owner laments.

The Neimoidian bookmaker is bound with a set of special shackles that will bind not only the hands, but also his feet; he is now the prisoner held in a special area of the cargo hold of their ship. As the others escorted and carried the Neimoidian book maker to the Ugohr plants the baseball-shaped charges, which are set to explode across the tavern that once housed the illegal gambling operation. Once he has finished planting the charges, Ugohr makes back for the captured Neimoidian shuttle.

"Look, Katzpah, issa best to free the players from the camp only after any una of usen is called up"

"Free the players? What nonsense!"

"The Neimoidians will quickly suspect Geonosian hands in killing the bounty hunters and come back with more battle mackineeks in an attempt to track down usen! For usen, time issa of da essence now."

"If the Neimoidian reinforcements come, I will be taking off and fight them from the air"

"Master, yousa da only anti-air unit the Geonosians have on dis planet, and a mackineek Neimoidian army would comprise vulture or tri-droids!"


	10. Chapter 9: Lockdown

**Chapter 9: Lockdown**

Ugohr's outlandish bets may have driven a bookmaker out of business last night, but the destruction of the tavern just in front of the Neimoidian baseball training camp brought with them bad news. Very bad news, as the tone of the facility director is no laughing matter. Moreover, the news is announced during the morning wake-up call for all the players, pitchers and batters alike. Ugohr senses that many players will complain about the sad state of affairs in short order. Now that the PA system is activated, the facility director is going to speak:

"Last night, a Geonosian strike team attacked the tavern just across the road from the ballpark. In accordance to the security protocol in effect, no one is allowed to go on the outdoor diamonds or otherwise leave the stadium until further notice, not even for punitive purposes, unless a player is called up to another league. Any players so leaving will not be replaced until the lockdown ends. We have already petitioned for reinforcements from the Neimoidian Baseball League because the Geonosians were affiliated with the Galactic Baseball Cartel. However, it is currently not known whether the Neimoidian Baseball League has any units to spare. We may also expect the Geonosians to take the battle to the camp momentarily. That is all"

Meanwhile, in the dormitory room that houses Ugohr and Katzpah, the mood is rather somber. It has four bunk bed units and hence twice as many occupants and the lights have just been turned on as the morning announcement ends. Clearly the pitchers who sleep in that room are very unhappy about it. Some others are wondering why the Geonosians even attacked in the first place. Sure, Ugohr understands that the only reason the Geonosians may have to attack this planet would be related to baseball, but others are mystified.

"What business do the Geonosians have out here anyway? One would think that they would attack stadiums where actual league games are played, and not a tavern close to the training camp!" the Bardottan pitcher commented.

"We have fallen headlong into a Geonosian trap!" the male Neimoidian sleeping above Ugohr lamented.

"Mesa know da Geonosians have many tricks up theirsa sleeves. Theysa may be leading a multi-pronged attack as wesa speak"

"If the rain days are any indication, the bullpens are going to be crowded; under these conditions, we won't be getting much practice time!" Katzpah added. "The Geonosians want to disrupt the Neimoidians' supply of players!"

"For the Geonosians, using tricks like these to disrupt the Neimoidian supply of players would be more effective on the batters than on the pitchers" the female Neimoidian sleeping above Katzpah commented.

"If we pitchers already complain about what the Geonosians are doing to us, batters will complain about it even more, especially those who prefer the fielding drills to batting practice, or those who need defensive training more than offensive training" Gukko observes.

"There are only two bullpens to be shared among… how many pitchers are in station here again?" the Bardottan asks.

"There must be about eighty pitchers in there. Since they will only let in seven pitchers at a time in a bullpen, everyone else will be in the gym"

With eighty-four pitchers in station, and the other players in the room gone to the players' dining room of the stadium, they have arrived first, and, since there is only space for seven people at a time in a bullpen, the pitchers' day begins by their breakfast, which is comprised of dry bread and protein shakes. All the pitchers are grouped on quadranium picnic chairs by groups of eight; naturally, Ugohr and Katzpah always seem to be together at meal time, at the table closest to the exit door. But once the meal time is over for the pitchers, the head pitcher coach comes forward:

"Players will be sorted into twelve groups. Odd-numbered groups will go into the third base bullpen, whereas even-numbered groups will go into the first base bullpen. Lowest-numbered group goes first, and everyone else goes to the basement gym. Each bullpen rotation lasts forty-five minutes, with lunch break. This is the procedure until the lockdown ends"

"Do not forget, Katzpah, da only way to free the players is to force an evacuation" Ugohr whispered into Katzpah's ear.

"But how do we force an evacuation without making it look that there were Geonosians involved?"

"Geonosians everywhere in the Neimoidians' minds at this time. Theysa will always, until da Geonosians are pasten, suspect Geonosians to be behind whatever force an evacuation"

"I guess, we're unlucky, we're going to be in pitching rotations 9 and 10 for the entire duration of the lockdown"

As the pitchers are herded into their respective positions, the batters are waiting in line to get seated in the players' dining room and to get their meals served by fallen, unruly players or by local convicts. Charzon is next to other Neimoidian batters, a third baseman and a woman that regularly played defensive drills alongside her on the right field. The latter was a lot less adept defensively but could bat just as well as she could. Charzon saw her play on multiple occasions, and her footwork may leave a little to be desired if her long-term plans involved playing in the outfield, especially above the D-level.

"Perhaps you should consider playing first base drills once the lockdown is over; it's similar to how you play right field, and playing first base, as well as right field, will double your chance of making the pros"

"Charzon, just because you can play in the outfield _like a Geonosian_ doesn't mean you can tell how flightless players should play" the Neimoidian right fielder sarcastically told Charzon while drinking her share of protein drinks.

"Yet I heard the coaches make that suggestion to you at the double"

"The head batting coach is going to speak!"

"Players will be sorted into four groups. Odd-numbered groups will go into the third base batting cages, whereas even-numbered groups will go into the first base batting cages. Lowest-numbered group goes first, and everyone else goes to the basement gym. Each batting cage rotation lasts forty-five minutes, with lunch break. This is the procedure until the lockdown ends"

Charzon is led to the row of batting cages where everyone in her assigned group is going to do their turn of batting practice, as much of batting practice they can do without actually going on the diamonds. Said batting cages are adaptative thanks to the presence of a camera and of a central control computer, not unlike the one onboard these antiquated Droid Control Ships. But she knows batting is far from the end of the story: she can feel that their defensive skills will suffer. By the time the lockdown ends, or the Geonosians capture the baseball camp, whichever happens first, the batters feel as if they will become one-trick ponies and that it will mostly keep them to either first-base or right-field, reducing their prospects in the professional leagues by about three-quarters.

Meanwhile, on Praesitlyn, the stadium's most prized possession, a captured Neimoidian C-suite officer publicly known as Darth Tami, is still in a containment field located in the stadium's bottommost basement. The Praesitlyn Cardinals general manager is receiving transmissions from the League's headquarters on Geonosis pertaining to the prisoner. Looks like the Geonosian league executives are very unhappy about leaving Darth Tami in a containment field in a stadium basement.

"You must freeze Darth Tami in carbonite. Now!" Kishuna ordered.

"But, ladies and gentlemen, the Neimoidians would require an army of bounty hunters to capture her from Praesitlyn! We have reinforced our positions, an army of battle droids is on station, plus we take up any stowaway or runaway passengers in service as bounty hunters" the Cardinals' general manager protested.

"The Neimoidians still haven't responded to our demands! She is too dangerous to keep around in this condition because of the containment fields"

"Why? Why would containment fields be inappropriate?"

"Containment fields are inappropriate for long-term preservation of hostages. Plus it is highly possible that the Neimoidians land on Praesitlyn with an army with the sole objective of recapturing Darth Tami!"

"In that case, encasing her in carbonite has the advantage of allowing her to be transported out of Praesitlyn in an emergency. But, if we are to use an ysalamiri cage, we may put her in there, either in carbonite form or as a fully awake prisoner"

"Ysalamiri cages require more maintenance than a containment field. And Myrkr is the only place where ysalamiri cages are manufactured, on the black market at that. Plus Myrkr is under Neimoidian control"

"How could Myrkr be under Neimoidian control if baseball is nonexistent on this planet?"

"Most ysalamiri cage manufacturers contract freelancers for delivery. Sometimes they will let the client choose a shipping service in the manufacturer's stead. Many of them are unaligned, but there is not one Geonosian-affiliated spacer that is among the list of recommended delivery servicers"

"The problem, manager, is that, if one of those Neimoidian-affiliated spacers realize that the delivery is to be made in Geonosian territory, and to one of their most prestigious major-league baseball teams, no less, they may refuse to deliver to us altogether" the quartermaster tells his boss. "Weapons are already hard enough to deliver, but we are not sourcing for law enforcement here!"

"Just order the ysalamiri cage, damnit!"

What the quartermaster knows is that most ysalamiri cage manufacturers are more "mom-and-pop" in how they operate, said cage is made-to-order, and they can't always afford to have full-time delivery services in-house. But whoever needs to imprison Force-sensitive persons will find them dangerous. And, even though the Outer Rim is mostly Geonosian territory, as far as baseball is concerned, Neimoidians in the underworld have a deep hatred of Geonosians. That's not satisfactory to the quartermaster, who now has a plan that will allow them to lay a trap for the Neimoidian spacer delivering the cage, but said plan requires a non-Geonosian middleman.

"We're persona non grata among the Neimoidians. Yet, we want to trap the Neimoidian spacer(s) making the delivery. We can't just take delivery of an ysalamiri cage without dealing some damage to the Neimoidians!"

"The Neimoidians are keeping a low profile here"

"Thus far, we've captured a makeshift fleet of, for lack of a better term, bounty hunter transport craft"

"What we need is a front company, staff it with non-Geonosian bounty hunters, and have the cage delivered to a baseball-less world. The non-Geonosians designated for that project will ferry it to Praesitlyn aboard one of those… bounty hunter transport craft"

"We need to know exactly how large is the cage before committing anyone to this plan; some ships may be unsuitable for carrying cages higher than a certain height. Plus we will pay a bonus if the Neimoidians carry stowaways"

"Get paid a bonus would be more accurate, since we then get the stowaways and the ship. Too often Neimoidian smugglers will carry stowaways. Plus we need Darth Tami to be frozen in carbonite first"

The Praesitlyn front office begins drafting the scope statement for the ysalamiri cage, and with it, the statement of work: it needs to have enough internal space so that a Darth Tami encased in carbonite can fit in it, said cage had to possess cortosis bars as well as an encrypted lock system. The bounty hunters designated for this project shook their heads in disbelief when they realize that one such customized item (as is often the case for ysalamiri cages) has such complex legal documentation that needs to be filled out. But before the contract can be signed by the bounty hunters and, from there, faxed to the manufacturer, the quartermaster asks a few questions.

"Who here can pilot a ship?"

"I can" Lucy answered.

"Will Neimoidians think I am too fat?"

"Fats, I think you know the answer because we used to work for them! Doesn't mean we now work for Geonosians that it will change what they will think of you as a person!"

"Cato Neimoidia dwellers seem quite different from the Neimoidians that travel the galaxy as spacers"

"Just don't mention anything about Geonosians or baseball once we take delivery of the ysalamiri cage"

"In fact, where are we headed?"

"It might take weeks before the cage actually gets built. All that we know is that our rendezvous point has no baseball team at all, and should not be too close to Eriadu or Praesitlyn"

"How far away from the closest of Eriadu or Praesitlyn is safe enough for them not to suspect a baseball-related order?"

"The problem is not so much how far from the closest _major league_ baseball franchise you are, but how far from the closest baseball franchise, period"

"We're going to need escort so that Darth Tami can be safely transported to the freezing chamber. Fats, Lucy, you're going with us alongside the battle droid detachment"

"But why send us to escort Darth Tami?"

"The ysalamiri cage is not due until a week or two"

"What are we to do to prevent her from escaping?"

"Of course, we administrated thanatizine, but that will last only for a short time. The closest carbonite freezing facility is a good distance away"

"There has to be one on Praesitlyn, just not in the vicinity of the stadium"


	11. Chapter 10: Callup

**Chapter 10: Callup**

Ten days have elapsed since the lockdown was decreed in the Lorimax baseball camp. The Geonosians have kept quiet and they mostly left the camp alone. But it's obvious that the morale of the players have considerably dropped since the lockdown was first declared. When the common wakeup call is made, on that morning, the facility director made an announcement about reinforcements being dispatched to the planet for the express purpose of defending the baseball training camp.

"Reinforcements are en route now. Two hundred battle droids are on the way, as well as a main battle tank. Plus, today, all players are to take breakfast at the same time; one of them is going to be called up"

In Charzon's room, the Neimoidian lady that always seemed, prior to the lockdown, to be training in fielding drills with her, had a conversation about the additional security measures being announced with Charzon, without suspecting that something was amiss about her. The other occupants of the room seemed not to notice what was going on; they were so ecstatic about the possibility that one of them would be called up that they forgot all about the announcement of reinforcements or why they needed reinforcements in the first place.

"More than additional security, more than additional clankers, what we would need is a chance to actually do fielding drills"

"Clankers?" They're ineffective against Geonosian bounty hunters; the attack on the tavern was perpetrated by Geonosian bounty hunters"

"The bounty hunters that did this got away; apparently, they are nowhere to be found on this world"

"It is estimated that, for every bounty hunter the Neimoidians kill, they need about fifty clankers on average"

"Well, our guess is that the one getting called up today is either a pitcher or a right fielder"

"Be lucky that we're in Neimoidian territory; we wouldn't stand a chance playing outfield were we on, say, Kadavo"

"Kadavo, Geonosian territory?" the Neimoidian female right fielder asked, surprised. "I always thought baseball would not have any traction this far away from Neimoidia or Geonosis"

Kadavo is the northernmost training camp in Geonosian territory. Often prospective outfielders that aren't Geonosian are advised to go to Neimoidian-operated training camps if they are dead set on playing outfield. But, at the same time, even if, technically, all castes can play at any position, in practice virtually all outfielders are from the warrior caste, and Geonosian drones on baseball teams are either pitchers or infielders. But Katzpah is intrigued by how could the Geonosians even were introduced to baseball in the first place. All that he knew about the history of baseball on Geonosis was that baseball was nonexistent on Geonosis during the two Galactic Civil Wars and at any point prior to the first Galactic Civil War. But because of the time allotted between the wake-up call and breakfast time… they can have a conversation about baseball history.

"Tell me, how did Geonosians end up even playing baseball in the first place? When?"

"It doesn't make any sense!" Gukko exclaimed. "Baseballs may hit people in the stands but this doesn't draw blood regularly"

"What trick of fate would allow Geonosians to be introduced to that sport?" the Bardottan asks.

"The only similarity to anything Geonosian is that a baseball diamond is about the same size as a Petranaki arena floor"

"Possibly a Geonosian drone woud bring baseball to Geonosis after hesa exile"

Speaking of which, the Petranaki arena used during the early stages of the First Battle of Geonosis is now called the Stalgasin Memorial Stadium and is the ballpark used by the major-league Geonosis team in the Galactic Baseball Cartel. When used as an execution arena, prisoners are positioned on the mound or at home plate, or more rarely at second base, and never will it require more than the mound-home plate-second base combination for that morbid task. However, the Stalgasin hive realizes that they must not hold executions on the same day as a baseball game in that particular facility, knowing the warrior caste seems to enjoy baseball. By now the conversation turns into a rant-fest about Stalgasin as a stadium.

"And man I wouldn't like to be playing a game at Stalgasin; they have the biggest foul area of any major-league stadium"

"It also has the highest fences"

"Any Neimoidian team can almost say _game over_ before the game even begins if they play at Stalgasin"

Most fans of opposing teams (i.e. non-Geonosians) visiting the Stalgasin Memorial Stadium seem to admire the numerous statues of both brave Geonosians that died during the Clone Wars and Jedi that died during the two Battles of Geonosis, along with the odd Civil War-era statue, even though said statues were commissioned only after it became a baseball stadium. After all, for every ticket to a Geonosis major-league game sold to off-worlders, there is a free ticket to the Clone Wars memorial, with exhibits about the Jedi, the Separatist vehicles. But their rant-fest about Stalgasin and, more generally, Geonosian baseball, is over once they are herded for breakfast. For this occasion, all the players enrolled at camp are placed together in the players' dining room, where, before any of the players could eat, the director of the facility comes face-to-face.

"For the first time since the lockdown has been declared, one of you will be called up. I apologize for any inconveniences that the lockdown made you do these endless hours in the gym, or locked in the batting cages"

Forty-five minutes per rotation, with five minutes to move around the stadium between each rotation for those who had to change stations between each block, for a total of nine hours of daily training with little rest. The facility director can tell that this regimen is rather exhausting on the players still at camp, but no real attempt at revolt has been made just yet. And one of the disgraced players is rolling drums in the PA system, giving the director a cue about who is going to be called up, along the team and its level.

"For those who have been here long enough, you have realized that most callups happen one at a time. Our last callup, Jusell, did win a start, and has yet to pitch another start, due to the pitch count being 107 at the time she was thrown out of the game during the eighth inning. She is to pitch tonight however. But enough about her progression as a player. Today, we hereby announce that not just one, or even two, but five players are going to be called up today!"

 _With six players gone to greater glories, a new Combine needs to be administered_ , Gukko thought, knowing that the rules mandate that a new Combine is administered when five or more players were called up since a Combine was last administered. On average a Combine is held every twenty days or so; despite the lockdown, the normal rate of callups is still happening. Nevertheless, the Neimoidian Combine is impossible to host under lockdown, and everyone that spent months in camp knows that, for the camp to be most effective to a player, they need to know what skillset the player brings to camp, and, from there, what positions is the player best suited for.

"Also, as per League regulations, a training camp that has supplied five or more players to professional teams must hold a new Combine. We therefore announce a temporary suspension of lockdown for this reason"

Large numbers of players breathe a sigh of relief upon hearing that, even if said relief may not last more than a day. But the players are still waiting to hear about who is going to be called up. Some long-timers are getting their hopes up to finally make it out of this world that has been nothing more than a backwater baseball camp to them, while others think their turn is still somewhat premature. That disgraced player is rolling drums again.

"Three of the players I will name at this time are pitchers, and two more are batters. As is traditionally the case in Neimoidian territory, when more than one player is called up at the same time, the announcement order is in descending order of time spent in camp. The first player being called up is…" the camp director announces while the disgraced player rolls the drums. "Katzpah, congratulations, you're going to suit up for the Aphran Gadgeteers. Next up is Tyridium…"

While Ugohr saw one of his neighbors rise earlier, it's Charzon's turn to see one of her neighbors go to the front of the dining room. Tyridium played right field when Charzon was up in the center when they last played fielding drills. The Neimoidian lady is followed by yet another Neimoidian player, Gukko, and both are slated to play on Borleias, even though Tyridium is slated to play first base rather than right field. But the last two names to be announced at this time feel much more uncomfortable for the facility's director to talk about.

"The most surprising thing about these two names is that they are the last two players we've even accepted here. Yodel Splee and Charzon, please come up front. You're now to play for the Vakkar Amphibians at pitcher and center field respectively"

"Boo! Boo!" Attis booed the two players.

"But fear not, those with more experience of the camp. Your turn may come one day; you just need to play your best at all times. That said, everyone prepare the fields for the next Combine"

Ugohr, Charzon and Katzpah come together as pitching machines are readied, bats and baseballs are prepared, and, even though disgraced players do much of the work of getting the camp ready for the next Combine, players still in the camp's good graces still need to ensure that the various diamonds of the facility are ready for the throngs of amateur players that signed up for the Combine from around the Fakir sector and a few come from beyond it. But the trio of newly called-up players have one trick up their sleeve as they meet in the pitcher's dorm room.

"The Combine is a natural occasion for the diversion we need"

"Wesa have a plan: take da baseballs in the bag, go into the bathrooms and throw una in each bathroom. Charzon, yousa take the ladies' rooms, mesa take the men's rooms and Katzpah, plant thesa baseballs in the gender-neutral rooms"

Here gender-neutral bathrooms have one toilet bowl apiece, and are all designed for people with disabilities. They are, however, much less numerous but nonetheless mandated by law for each powerchair-accessible facility. Even though, in the case of gender-neutral bathrooms, one room, one fixture, that is not the case for the rest of the stadium, which has as many as 12 bathrooms for each gender. Said bathrooms come in threes.

"How would clogging up the camp's plumbing help us achieve what we need?"

"Theysa not simple baseballs. Theysa boomas, booma da maxibig stadium. Quick before the boomas explode!"

"One thermal detonator per bathroom!" Charzon ordered.

"Issa possible dat wesa not survive this. Please tell Master Telso that mesa did my best in destroying the baseball camp"

"Will these bombs trigger an evacuation alert?" Katzpah asked.

"Most likely a few seconds before the first one detonates. Split up and we meet outside the stadium if we survive"

"Will we have enough time to make it out of the stadium after the bombs detonate?"

"Wesa have foosa minutes to make it out of the stadium once the boomas in the toilets. Wesa can remain undetected if wesa close the bucket before exiting the bathroom!"

Ugohr may actually be referring to the lack of security cameras in the bathrooms, thanks to privacy laws. His original bucket of rigged baseballs was split three ways in three old, empty baseball buckets. They each took their personal belongings as well, prior to making their runs inside the stadium's bathrooms, given Ugohr's warning, and that the main objective is to destroy the stadium, which would render the camp unusable for the Neimoidians, because it would contain storage space for virtually all the equipment for training. Therefore Ugohr went for the second floor, third-base wing, Charzon for the basement and Katzpah for the ground floor, first-base wing.

And Ugohr races towards the men's bathroom closest to the edge of the ballpark, while carrying a sealed bucket of baseballs; he seems to be content putting the rigged baseball into a urinal because time is of the essence here. The urinal in which he puts the first disguised thermal detonator quickly clogs, and, as a result, water accumulates in that particular urinal. But whenever he could find out-of-order fixtures, Ugohr would just put the thermal detonator into said fixture, otherwise he would just take the closest urinal to plant his charge.

Because every staffer, and player, was busy doing anything but going to the toilets, they otherwise encounter no resistance. However, Charzon is slower in planting the charges inside the ladies' washrooms because she needs to go inside the booth to plant the charges, whereas Ugohr and Katzpah can just pitch them inside the fixtures. Due to Charzon's sluggishness, she couldn't get all the charges planted in time and she still has baseballs in her bucket by the time the first thermal detonator explodes in a fiery explosion that punches a hole into the third-base wing of the stadium.

"The Geonosians are attacking! Abandon the stadium!" the automated security system blared out upon detecting the first explosion caused by an active charge.

All available battle droids are activated to escort staff out of the stadium, as well as players still inside the stadium. But many players working on auxiliary diamonds are being herded back to the designated gathering points marking evacuation areas around the main stadium, leaving behind their equipment. Nevertheless, the attackers are alongside a few disgraced players, a few battle droids and the facility's front office at their gathering point, which lies about forty meters away from the main entrance.

The facility director observes, in horror, the explosions in the stadium seemingly coming from locations where plumbing fixtures were to be found. Mystified, he begins to wonder how the explosions could come from plumbing, such as washrooms. And he is saddened as he sees the baseball facility in which he worked for so long lay in ruins as a result of the attack. As a result of internal baseball warfare. But, for some reason, he seems to restrain himself from cursing Kishuna, Geonosians or the Jedi Order. He counted his blessings, for making it out of the exploding stadium alive was probably a stroke of luck on his part.

"The Geonosians appear to have rigged plumbing fixtures to explode. Yet these plumbing fixtures were not replaced in years, and we did not hire external plumbers, or external maintenance, post-Praesitlyn, and plumbing maintenance protocols were not modified in any shape or form either"

"It can't be work made by the Geonosians proper" the stadium's quartermaster commented. "Perhaps some disgruntled baseball player intending to turn himself to the Geonosians, a pitcher or an infielder most likely; they will never accept the defection of an outfielder"

"Commence roll call!" the facility director ordered.

On the horizon, the people at that gathering point observe a convoy of shuttles in the distance, flying towards the stadium. However, they couldn't tell yet whether the shuttle was a transport that carried the reinforcements promised to the Neimoidians operating the ballparks, or a transport piloted by Geonosian bounty hunters. The quartermaster began making the roll call of the people at his gathering point, given the manifest of the staff and the players. As for the players called up to the professional leagues, their names were not yet stricken off the camp's player manifest.


	12. Chapter 11: Escape from Lorimax

**Chapter 11: Escape from Lorimax**

Near the abandoned homestead that was home to Garam for the entire time his Padawan was in station inside the baseball camp, two light freighters landed, loaded with about forty battle droids apiece, two pilots apiece. A YT-1300 and a StarSpeeder 3000, both of which have seen better days and were captured by Praesitlyn-based bounty hunters. But, at the same time, an AT-AT barge was headed towards the despite the fact that neither the Neimoidians nor the Geonosians operate AT-ATs. Each side probably wants the transports intact, hence why neither side shot at each other. The pilots get out of their respective ships, and the B2 battle droids are unloaded and activated afterward.

"What now?" Lucy asked.

"Lucy, Homasa, Novala, take up positions in the homestead, I will go up with Garam and follow the clankers from behind. Garam can fly and thus distract the tank while we pelt the enemy clankers from the homestead."

At this time, Garam flies off as high as he could, armed with a Gronosian sonic blaster, with the objective of making it at the top of the enemy heavy AAT. The droids somehow stay immobile but he did not open fire at them; he was too busy dodging the light blue shots the heavy AAT's laser cannon is firing at him. That, despite the heavy AAT having a clear shot at the target. For all his ability to fly, Garam is way slower than a Geonosian Advanced Starfighter. And Fats held the road while still being out of firing range of the Neimoidian clankers, B1 and B2-series. But their aim is so poor they can't hit him from a high altitude.

"Take cover!" Fats ordered her battle droids, with battle droids climbing their way through the trees in the apple orchard standing between the abandoned homestead and the baseball camp.

Meanwhile, the trio of bounty hunters enter the green-gabled abandoned homestead, lugging equipment around. Homasa and Novala are setting up a G-Web repeating blaster inside an antiquated sleeping room on the second floor. They know the floor can withstand the weight of two people and a repeating blaster, but they are worried about the heat generated by the power generator of the autocannon. Lucy, on the other hand, is fixing the bayonet on her MR-73 sniper rifle in the other sleeping room next to the one with the G-Web repeater. With the addition of the bayonet, which is rather thin but elongated, the MR-73 was longer than its wielder was tall. But also, the facility director inspects the droids, which took up formations with the tank at the very back of the column about to advance on the road to the abandoned homestead (and hence the Geonosian transports).

"Sir, the Geonosians are advancing, there is a Jedi with them" the heavy AAT's droid commander told the baseball camp director.

"All units, advance towards the homestead! Leave no Geonosian scum, organic or droid, alive!"

"Roger, roger" the droid commanding officer, a B2 battle droid with yellow trim, replied.

The baseball camp director thus has three hundred seventy battle droids at his disposal. The battle droids on the Neimoidian side hence outnumber the staff and the players being herded in gather points due to an attack executed on the stadium a while earlier. But the battle droids escorting the gather points left their posts to provide reinforcements to the Neimoidians if the first wave of battle droids was defeated. Nevertheless, he provided instructions to the players and stadium staff to make for the AT-AT barge.

"The enemy clankers are on the move!" Novala commented to Homasa, who began firing the weapon along the road.

As a result, the clankers get downed one by one, while Lucy also snipes at clankers from her position in the improvised bunker that is the green-gables homestead, firing a shot every two seconds. But the Neimoidian clankers are too busy trying to shoot Garam down, and the few that actually fire at the homestead miss their mark and fire rather wildly, sometimes hitting the property across the road from their target, and continuous fire makes the clankers' approach that much more difficult. But, upon realizing that there is a much greater threat in the homestead, the tank crews have ceased targeting Garam, who took a lucky hit on his sonic blaster by a B2 droid. Consequently, Garam tries firing the blaster, to no avail; the blaster hit rendered the weapon unusable.

But only fifty droids were hit by the bounty hunters in the homestead before they reached the apple orchard. When the remaining column of clankers approaches the vicinity of the orchard, the B2 droids in the foliage detects them, and Fats ignites her lightsaber from behind an apple tree.

"The enemy clankers are not suspecting anything…" a B2 battle droid comments.

"Fire!"

At this point, the battle droids fire one shot through the foliage apiece and they jump out of the trees, where they hid waiting for the right timing. Unfortunately for them, the Neimoidian droids fire at them in an entire brawl made up of droids, where the more aggressive nature of the B2 battle droid means that they can sometimes use their forearms to shove enemy B1 droids aside, even if doing so makes them vulnerable from a different angle. Stray fire took several Geonosian units down…

"Hold the line!"

While the droids of both camps are shooting at each other, the camp's complement of players and staff members is hiding inside a retracted AT-AT barge, thanks to its droid crew opening the front door, which came with a retractable stairway. And man a retracted AT-AT barge can contain so many bucket seats that the two hundred seventy-four people all sit on a bucket seat, fourteen seats abreast, and then some, which old AT-AT barges outfitted for civilian passenger use do, as cargo space.

"Why are we stuck inside a bucket of bolts? We should be leaving this planet!" Gukko complained.

"Security protocol"

"Wesa have to wait for the _all clear_!"

"This place reminds me of a Bespin Direct flight I once took… did the League purchase that ship from them?" Tyridium commented.

"Yes, post-Praesitlyn"

In fact, its former owner, Bespin Direct, split the internal space of AT-AT barges into three decks, the two passenger decks, with the lower of these two holding 335 passengers in bucket seats and the topmost one holding 60 passengers in cabins and an extra 130 in bucket seats, and the lower deck, or cargo deck, can carry outsize cargo (by passenger spaceline standards) such as heavy AATs. Or even two AT-ATs. While the facility director moves into the cockpit via a turbolift located near the very first row of seats, everyone else buckles their seatbelts, because the area outside of the ship is not safe at all.

Meanwhile, Garam ignites his lightsaber when landing right on top of the tank, cutting down the barrel amid a throng of clankers. Near the apple orchard, however, the droid contingents of both sides are locked into a stalemate; in an attempt to resolve it, Fats enters the fray. While doing so, she uses her lightsaber as if she was trying to hit multiple baseballs at the same time. Except that here the "baseballs" she may attempt to hit are much smaller in size than a baseball. They may not always hit wherever they want, but at least _some_ did hit enemy clankers, while other clankers are sliced instead. At the same time, inside the homestead…

"Homasa, Novala, hold your fire, you're not helping here" Lucy ordered, thinking that G-Webs are imprecise at the range they're firing at, and that a MR-73 is more accurate.

Manufactured by the Drearian Defense Conglomerate, MR-73s are not only long-barreled, but also more accurate than assault weapons or blaster pistols at long ranges. Lucy blasted an enemy clanker every three seconds, while taking care not to hit Fats, Garam or friendly clankers, who all do their best to fight the formation of enemy clankers along the country road leading to the baseball camp. And, unfortunately, the friendly clankers were almost entirely wiped out alongside the enemy clankers, especially when the Neimoidian B2s were dispatched to engage the two lightsaber-wielders and the Geonosian B2s.

"That was the first wave. The facility director asked for all available units" Garam warned as two separate groups, about thirty to forty each, approach their position. "Fats, stay here while I take out the group on the far side of the stadium's rubble"

"They're splitting up!" the droid commander reported, before turning to its second-in-command. "Make sure the Geonosian scum does not reach the barge"

Meanwhile, inside the barge, the baseball camp director, Julz Serban, is shoving aside the RX-series droid pilots, which show no resistance. Once the RX-series droid pilots have been shoved aside, he takes the captain's seat and initiates the takeoff sequence. Because it was designed for fast turnaround, the AT-AT barge takeoff sequence was easy to follow; Julz, who previously had little experience piloting even light freighters, was able to get the barge ready for takeoff. With an empty lower hold, taking off has been somewhat easier than with about 300 battle droids and a heavy AAT tank. Ugohr follows the trail left behind by Julz in the Force, with Charzon in tow.

"Land that ship; we do not have the all clear to depart"

"Da Geonosians will shoot usen down!"

"Stand down or the Geonosians will have our heads!"

"Yousa still want the players alive" Ugohr tells him while waving his hand.

"I still want the players alive" Julz responds.

"Yousa will land the ship"

"I will land the ship"

And the landing sequence is equally easy to carry out; while under the effects of the mind trick Ugohr just administered, Garam enters the cockpit hatch; the ground below the barge is just one big droid graveyard judging by the action that took place on the surface. The barge is landing on one of the baseball diamonds that has otherwise been devoid of droid carcasses, but he had a chance to beg for mercy in front of the Geonosians that were in all directions.

"I surrender! The Lorimax training facility has been destroyed, I cannot continue to operate it! What are your terms for surrender?"

"The baseball players are largely innocent, but you are accused of labor code violations. Mistreatment of employees, illegal docking of salary, unsafe work environment, salary being paid out less than the legal frequency…" Charzon accuses, flashing the camp's payroll records in front of him.

The crimes of which Julz is accused are numerous and would, under normal circumstances, warrant prison sentences for him, as well as hefty fines for the now-destroyed camp, which is now declared insolvent. And Garam is allowed to enter the barge in an attempt to negotiate surrender terms with the as well as some measure of reparation for his crimes when he ran the camp. The camp being destroyed, Julz feels devastated after losing all that he worked so hard towards. He feels that he has failed the Neimoidian Baseball League. A few hours later…

"Open a channel to da Vakkar front office"

"This is Charzon, from Lorimax Training Camp. I have the regret to inform you that the camp has been destroyed in a Geonosian attack"

"Also, da Gungan pitcher called Yodel Splee and Charzon actually… bounty hunters on Geonosian pay. Issa obvious wesa have talent enough to play on a professional team, just not a Neimoidian one"

"You… Geonosian traitors! But there has no indication that there has been any fraud or treachery whatsoever on your part at camp, or that there was any misconduct from camp staff"

"Yousa need another pitcher and another outfielder"

The transmission ends, and Ugohr takes over the PA system onboard the refitted AT-AT barge in an attempt to address the remaining 271 people onboard the ship, while letting Charzon land it near one of the ancillary baseball fields of the former training camp. Sure enough, she engages the autoland sequence as Ugohr addresses the survivors of the attack on the camp:

"Mesa Ugohr Poof, and on behalf of the Geonosians, mesa hereby announce that the staff issa free to return to their homeworlds. In accordance to the terms of the director's surrender, players still alive can either choose to return to their homeworlds or to be transferred to another camp, at the discretion of the Galactic Baseball Cartel, with una year of salary at the rookie level for the players who spent less than una year in camp, or duey years of salary at that level for those who spent more than una year"

The remaining barge occupants keep quiet, knowing that the compensation may well be inadequate, but pushing for more would lead the baseball leagues to escalate hostilities between one another. Julz is handcuffed and brought in the same cargo hold compartment onboard the XS-1500 freighter that contained the coffins of the dead bounty hunters in Neimoidian service. A little cruel for his transportation, sure, but the question remains: who will fly the barge back to Geonosian territory? All the non-Jedi bounty hunters gather outside the barge while the matter is being discussed.

"We can't risk a fighter being left alone on Lorimax and hence the Jedi cannot pilot the ship. But surely some bounty hunter could pilot the barge? Or the captured XS-1500?"

The other five bounty hunters all volunteer for taking the barge and they all roll a six-sided die; the bounty hunters with highest dice roll will win the right to pilot the ship. Charzon and Homasa both roll a 6, with the result that they have to re-roll the dice to decide who pilots what on the way to Geonosian territory. With this new round of dice-rolling, Homasa is at the command of the barge, whereas Charzon sits at the controls of the XS-1500. Meanwhile, all the other pilots are seated at the commands of their respective ships, awaiting the signal to depart the planet. And, of course, they need to start their engines first.

"All craft, prepare to take off and jump to hyperspace on my mark!"

"Standby"

Escorted by two Jedi-piloted fighters, the convoy of four Geonosian freighters, three of which are mostly empty, leave behind the region that was devastated by battle that Geonosians brought to the planet by way of two baseball players being planted there, plus another disgruntled player that ended up playing in the minors shortly before the attack. But they know that non-aligned pirates will likely attack them en route, and many of them would attack them regardless of whether they fly Geonosian or Neimoidian flags.

"Set course for Praesitlyn"

"Thersa not enough fuel to make it to Praesitlyn" Ugohr complained.

"Not in this barge either" Homasa complained as well.

"The final destination will be Praesitlyn all right, we just need a stop"


	13. Chapter 12: Getaway Package

**Chapter 12: Getaway package**

"Bounty hunter Loulan, comm in"

"We managed to save almost all the players and most of the staff from the training camp on Lorimax; we are delivering them directly to Praesitlyn"

"We have different instructions for you now. You are to take delivery of the ysalamiri cage we ordered weeks ago, on Chryya"

"To Chryya we go. On top of that, we need fuel"

A different set of instructions was then relayed by the Praesitlyn front office to Ugohr, who is piloting his trusty fighter, and his master is also piloting his very own Geonosian Advanced Starfighter. Charzon is piloting the XS-1500 light freighter captured in the first attack that caused the camp to be under lockdown, while Homasa flies the ex-Bespin Direct AT-AT barge. Even he can't believe that a "non-stop spaceline that doesn't stop caring" would use such… unrefined ships. With each transport loaded with staff and players, they have to ferry them safely to Praesitlyn with all speed.

"Bounty hunter Poof"

"Yes?"

"Follow Fats to Chryya, but once in orbit, head for Starport TK-421"

The Geonosian transports arrived safely on Chryya. On the one hand, Fats and Lucy are down to one of those spice mining villages where the only ships landing are often spice smugglers. However, as spice trade is largely uncorrelated with the criminal activities of baseball, few, if any, spice smugglers are, simply put, baseball-aligned at all. Upon arriving at the miner's village, where they do not see that many offworld pilots at any one time, the ladies are going to a cantina not unlike the one Ugohr et al destroyed on Lorimax, hoping to meet the deliveryman responsible for the delivery of an ysalamiri cage to them.

"Who… are you? Exotic dancers?" a Gran spice miner asked Fats.

"I'm too fat to be an exotic dancer, why?"

A Wookie space miner grunted in disagreement. That Wookie didn't actually find Fats to be so fat as to be an ineffectual exotic dancer, or exotic at least from the Wookie's standpoint. The spice miners, including a Sullustan, an Iktochi, a Rodian as well as a few others all clamored for Fats to dance, yet all that Fats had for clothing was a baseball uniform. Perhaps the baseball uniform, devoid of any team crest, gave her the impression that she was fatter than she actually was. But once she warmed up, the Wookie growled for her to take off her baseball uniform before she starts dancing, igniting her lightsaber to appease the crowd, who wanted to see exotic dancing and was determined to obtain some out of Fats.

"What is your business on this world?"

"Taking delivery of an ysalamiri cage. Since the ysalamiri cage is empty, for the leg to the cage's destination, we would also like to deliver spice inside the cage" Lucy explained.

"We have to deliver two dozen kegs in excess" the Iktochi spice miner told Lucy.

"What's your destination?" the Gran spice miner asked.

"Praesitlyn"

"Praesitlyn? We don't usually deliver there. But, to take these two dozen kegs to Praesitlyn, you need to fork over five hundred nova crystals or their equivalent in credits within sixty days"

Nova crystals come in all shapes and sizes, but what most people think about when they think about nova crystals as barter devices are roughly two centimeters wide and a few millimeters thick, worth approximately 15 credits. But it's obvious to Lucy that 500 nova crystals of that denomination clearly won't suffice even if it was the lowest-grade version. A single keg of low-grade spice was already worth that amount of such nova crystals, let alone 24 of them. Lucy asked for the size of the nova crystals in their request, which the Gran space miner flashed. The five hundred crystals being referred to were about five centimeters wide and 1.5 centimeters thick.

"We'll think about it. But why we want the cage actually has to do with baseball!"

"Baseball!" Lucy screamed. "BASE-BALL!"

Many spice miners just looked the other way, even after Lucy showed them a baseball, but Fats and Lucy were the first ones surprised. Not even the Neimoidian-aligned bounty hunter from whom they were supposed to obtain the ysalamiri cage would do so much as raise an eyebrow. What bewildered Fats and Lucy was that their methods of gauging criminal activity based on baseball affiliation were deeply flawed. On some planets, mostly those with major-league baseball teams like Praesitlyn, Geonosis, Neimoidia and Koru Neimoidia, the entire underworld of these locations revolves around baseball. Everything they knew about crime and their turf wars had to do with baseball.

"Where do you come from?"

"My ship is registered on Praesitlyn, I find your lack of knowledge in baseball's involvement in underworld activities disturbing"

"Fats! Fats! Fats!" the Rodian spice miner chanted, joined by two more miners, and then by the others, asking for an encore on her part. Even the Wookie growled in agreement.

On the other hand, Fats doesn't feel as she could dance again. There really isn't much that, in exotic dancing (or at least the kind that they want) would even resemble what a lightsaber fight is, in terms of moves, as far as her lightsaber combat style is concerned. She begins to make an effort of concentration so as to not listen to their grunts and whatnot, and waves a pendulum at the crowd, as if for a hypnosis show, rather than for an exotic dance:

"I'm too fat to be an exotic dancer"

"She's too fat to be an exotic dancer"

"I'm a bounty hunter on Geonosian payroll"

"She's a bounty hunter on Geonosian payroll"

"The baseball wars are coming!"

"The baseball wars are coming!"

Fats even imprints into the spectators a mental image of herself actually being too fat to be an exotic dancer, which is a lot fatter than she actually is. As the hypnosis show continues, the crowd falls asleep, even Lucy. By that point, only Fats and the Wookie are awake. The Wookie did not respond to Fats' hypnosis show. Oh, of course, hypnosis shows are virtually unknown in this corner of the galaxy, but these spice miners would probably have found hypnosis-as-entertainment exotic. The Wookie even tries to hug Fats to find out whether she really is "too fat to be an exotic dancer". As fat as she tried to plant in their minds. That Wookie is about to crush Fats as if she was a tin can. Again, she tried what she can with her hand motion as restrained as it is.

"Stop crushing me!"

The Wookie spice miner whines and releases the Mirialan girl, whom he did not find to be "too fat to be an exotic dancer" in the end. But, by breaking her concentration, the Wookie forces the hypnosis show to end and everyone else awakens. Then everyone else applauds her, because at least someone appreciates the show, due presumably to its exotic nature, despite not being a dancing performance. In the end, she asks a question about whether they think Fats is really that fat… so as to determine whether she's complaining about it like it's becoming pathological or not. And whether they liked the hypnosis show that just ended.

"Still think I'm not too fat to be an exotic dancer?" she asked, while pointing the Wookie that almost crushed her. "You don't count"

"You're no Twi'lek, but I've seen ladies your species with a similar build that did not complain about being too fat for their own good"

"Since you've been hired by the Geonosians, you've been complaining about how you're too fat to do a given part of your job. On day one you even said that you were more of a strength girl than one of agility"

"Who ordered an ysalamiri cage? Your order is waiting right outside the cantina!"

The bounty hunter showed the ladies their invoice for the ysalamiri cage, as well as supplies for the ysalamiri so that the ysalamiri cage survives the road back to Praesitlyn. And his grav sled that broke down during the trip to Chryya. The cage was so heavy that not even Fats could lift it on her own. Only with the efforts of all three people could the cage be carried successfully from the Neimoidian bounty hunter's ship to the StarSpeeder 3000's cargo hold. With Lucy panting and the Neimoidian being exhausted, Fats stands within range of the Neimoidian bounty hunter, just as exhausted as the other two. Meanwhile, inside Starport TK-421, Ugohr is in a waiting room while the barge boards a few passengers bound for Praesitlyn, and their fighters are stowed in the barge's cargo hold.

"Mesa sense the presence of a Neimoidian bounty hunter"

"Fats and Lucy are there to deal with that bounty hunter, young Padawan. Our mission is to get the rescued players and staffers safely to a planet with baseball facilities"

"Looky, a getaway!"

The vidscreen at Starport TK-421, where an immense parking for private craft took up an entire wing of the station, displayed an advertisement, where some images of Geonosis, Praesitlyn and Eriadu each appeared in its own baseball diamond-shaped frame, from left to right. The first baseball diamond expands into occupying the entire screen, at the start of the advertisement.

"Do you desire a place to get away? How about three? Get spectacular views of the canyons and mesas of Geonosis, the first stop on the Calzard Vacations Getaway Package. Stay and learn about the Clone Wars among the ruins and battlefields of this planet and enjoy the finest baseball games in the galaxy every single night" The picture returns to its baseball diamond state, and images of Praesitlyn's forests appear on the screen. "The fun continues on Praesitlyn, where you'll sleep under the stars in the wilderness" One last shift in images bring them to the cityscapes of Eriadu. "Your third stop will bring you to the shopping malls and vacation resorts of Eriadu, where you can relax and shop to your heart's content like nowhere in the Outer Rim, recently voted _Best shopping destination in the Outer Rim_ by _Hyperspace Traveler_ " The screen returns to the three baseball diamonds, with a view of each world visited along the way. "This Calzard Vacations Getaway Package is three times the fun in one, so ask your travel agent to book yours today!"

"This tour is all about baseball, young Padawan"

"Do Calzard fly to Borleias or Aphran? Wesa have dee players being called up to teams on these worlds"

"No, young Padawan, there are no non-stop flights from here to these worlds. But they can fly to Coruscant and, from there, to wherever they need to go to. They will have to contact their respective teams for arrangements"

On the ground, however, the ladies have somewhat recovered from carrying the ysalamiri cage into their ship, Fats recovering faster than Lucy did. But they're still mostly spent from their attempt at carrying the ysalamiri cage. Fats rise from the ground, where she is looking for the exhausted bounty hunter that sold the ysalamiri cage to the Praesitlyn Cardinals through a shell company created so that the Cardinals can procure sensitive equipment without having to be wary of baseball allegiance, or from Neimoidian-aligned sources. She finds the bounty hunter panting and hence igniting her lightsaber. She points the lightsaber to the bounty hunter's head…

"Please, don't hurt me… I'm just a spice courier" the Neimoidian bounty hunter responds, visibly short of breath and crawling on the ground.

"You'll regret the day you swore allegiance to the Neimoidian Baseball League!"

"Ge-Geonosians? Nooooooooo…" the Neimoidian bounty hunter screamed in horror, while still being unable to get up to speed and crawling back to his ship.

"You will now serve the Galactic Baseball Cartel or be destroyed!"

"I will never serve Geonosian scum!"

Fats flashes the pendulum she used during the hypnosis show. "You will now serve the Galactic Baseball Cartel"

"I will now serve the Galactic Baseball Cartel"

At this time, Lucy reached for her blaster pistol, aiming at the bounty hunter's legs on stun setting and sensing that she couldn't trust the Neimoidian bounty hunter to turn his back on the Neimoidian Baseball League, not even under hypnosis. After two shots, he falls on the ground, stunned. Then he is locked away in a compartment of his own ship, bound and in shackles. Since that Ringovinda StarYards _Pullman_ -class light freighter has quite a bit more internal space than their StarSpeeder 3000, spread over two decks, they can bind and gag him to any of the seats.

In passenger service, the locomotive-shaped _Pullmans_ came in many varieties: ranging from the versions with 12-16 passengers used as luxury yachts, 52 passengers in roomette cabins flown by such companies as Calzard Vacations to the 166-seat variety used by Star Tours, with limited cargo space in all three of the above cases. Here however, only 54 of the original 166 seats are in use, and the aft portions of the ship are used for cargo. _Pullmans_ can be quickly configured for mixed passenger and cargo use. And so Fats enters the cargo hold through a door located at the back of the lower deck galley. What she discovers is, simply put, as much of an Ali Baba's cave as could be possible with about two-thirds of the "payload volume" of a Pullman being used as a cargo hold: nova crystals, weapons, drugs, but no slaves.

"Lucy, I'll take these nova crystals and load the 24 kegs of spice aboard your ship. There is a truckload of weapons in there, as well as another 24 kegs of Neutron Pixie, the same size as those miners wanted to sell to us"

"I am to take that this _Pullman_ is now yours to fly on the job, but you want to share the risk"

Lucy repairs the grav sled to put it back into working condition, while Fats serves caf for two. 500 "SWGB-standard" nova crystals later, and in the dead of night, they have themselves 24 low-grade spice kegs for delivery on Praesitlyn, where the Cardinals will use the drugs as they see fit. But they can't refuse a shipment of weapons, including 166 MR-73s, thirty portable proton SAM launchers (even though the SAMs themselves can be used against ground as well as airborne vehicles) alongside 525 rounds, and twenty-one G-Webs. But it won't be long until the local underworld realizes that such a cache of weapons is a juicy target, regardless of what baseball allegiance Chryya ends up swearing. Lucy thus opened a channel to the Cardinals' front office on Praesitlyn, prior to leaving the planet.

"Channel open"

"According to these Neimoidian documents accompanying this weapons shipment, the One Sith is planning a full-scale attack on Praesitlyn in an attempt to recover Darth Tami. Its Neimoidian owner is now under Geonosian custody."

"We also captured an important cache of weapons and drugs, hundreds of MR-73s, portable SAM launchers, G-Webs, 24 kegs of spice"

"This has all but confirmed out suspicions. The defenses of Praesitlyn are now on full alert, but the One Sith will require an entire army to take Darth Tami off our hands"

With the criminal mobs of the area now on her toes, Lucy runs towards the cockpit of her StarSpeeder 3000 while Fats closes all the entrances of the _Pullman_ -class light freighter that she now calls her own. At the same time, Ugohr receives a transmission from the same Praesitlyn front office as they prepare to return to that planet, urging them to return. But he also has to keep track of whether this mission can count towards his Trials count. He has a grand total of five Trials to pass before he can have his own Padawan. Thus far he passed the Trials of the Flesh, Skill and Courage, the last two during the attack on the ballpark on Cato Neimoidia.


	14. Chapter 13: Camping on Praesitlyn

**Chapter 13: Camping on Praesitlyn**

The ysalamiri cage has arrived intact on Praesitlyn, where the quartermaster expected the cage to hold Darth Tami, who, as a block of carbonite, has been disgraced, even though she used to wear luxurious headgear and a dress in the Brint Set collection. But then Ugohr thought that sleeping under the stars on Praesitlyn with his master was a good idea, a good distance away from the stadium. With that said, the spot taken is about a thousand kilometers away from the stadium, on the other side of the mountain range from the desert area where the baseball stadium is. Here the redwood trees are almost as high as the wroshyr trees on Kashyyyk, but not quite, as they reach about 120 meters.

"With the information supplied by Fats, Charzon and Lucy, mesa think that the involvement of the Jedi issa just a ploy to get the Geonosians complete control of the galactic professional baseball world, more than simply spreading the One Sith thin"

"How so, young Padawan?"

"Kishuna wait until wesa attack the stadium on Cato Neimoidia to take control of the maxibig baseball world; hesa do nothin before una other party exposed One Sith involvement in baseball"

"He is not Force-sensitive in the slightest, so he couldn't have detected the presence of the dark side of the Force. I am the first Geonosian Force-sensitive individual ever recorded"

"Da Jedi Council issa being fooled if theysa think theysa hepin a light-sided baseball organization. Kishuna's cover issa just una illusion"

"Don't tell me you're going to turn your back on the Order or on the Geonosians! Or on baseball! You said it so yourself: you had enough talent to play professional baseball, just not on a Neimoidian team"

"Thersa still good in Kishuna however. Even though da Galactic Baseball Cartel wish to paste da One Sith for business reasons, hesa knows dat balance in the Force is important for everyone"

In the end, Ugohr may be wondering why he even bothered take part in the mission that ultimately led to the destruction of the stadium, or even follow through on the offensive against the Neimoidian Baseball League, which was still part of the Galactic Baseball Cartel at the time. For the past few weeks he has been carrying out his rather limited role in the Baseball Wars, as an undercover Geonosian agent. But Fats' raid brought to Praesitlyn some rather troubling development: the Neimoidians are directly arming anti-baseball opposition on Praesitlyn itself. Now deprived of a source of heavy weapons, the Neimoidians will be forced to rely on their main army if they were to attack Praesitlyn in an attempt to recapture Darth Tami.

"Itsa possible dat the quartermaster of the stadium may also be possessed by da dark side of da Force"

"The stadium's quartermaster, fallen to the dark side? He might have been a little cruel towards smugglers that carry hazardous materials to arm the stadium; he might have done excessive bloodshed… but that doesn't prove his murderous behavior is due to him falling to the dark side"

"Kishuna issa perverting the usage of Jedi"

If Ugohr's train of thought is to be believed, the Jedi Council has reasons to doubt that they are doing the right thing by planting Jedi in an attempt to help fight the Sith-controlled Neimoidian Baseball League. He thus attempts to contact the Jedi Council on Coruscant while parked on Praesitlyn, with this troubling discovery about how the Galactic Baseball Cartel operated as far as their usage of Jedi was concerned. Now, he doesn't seem overly concerned by whether the Neimoidians will intercept his message, but he'll transmit anyway.

"Wesa discover dat Kishuna misuse Jedi for business reasons"

"But it's undeniable, however, that the One Sith is involved in the affairs of the Neimoidian Baseball League" Lavak retorted.

"But how is Kishuna misusing Jedi?" Krant asked.

"Hesa usen Jedi for commando missions, for criminal turf wars. Wesa not keepen peace hair, wesa not maintaining da balance in da Force. For hesa, munching the One Sith issa just a pretext to taken the control of the maxibig baseball world"

"It appears that you have passed the Trial of Insight, Ugohr. There is one last trial left for you to undertake before you are to proceed directly to Coruscant, should you pass that final trial, the Trial of Spirit" Nazarie ruled.

The Trial of Spirit was trying for a whole lot of people, and required a Padawan undertaking it to enter deep meditation so as to see the enemy within their own selves or, as the late Even Piell would say, facing the mirror. While Ugohr prepares his yoga mat, the Jedi Council debates the next course of action to undertake as the Baseball Wars unfold. By now, no planet equipped with baseball facilities is safe from the turf wars between the two baseball leagues, and the Jedi Council is caught in the muck, now that information relayed by Fats to Ugohr made it to them.

"Fellow councillors, the poodoo has hit the fan. We are now facing a full-scale underworld war thanks to the One Sith. We shall deploy Jedi only if we have to engage Sith Lords" Lennart comments to the assembly.

"We can virtually guarantee that the Neimoidians will not sit at a negotiations table with the Geonosians until the Neimoidians' contingent of Sith Lords is defeated"

"Ugohr's intelligence claims that the Neimoidians are to dispatch a contingent of Sith Lords, alongside the Neimoidian Baseball League's army, on Praesitlyn"

"A long time the Neimoidians need to assemble their armies"

"But to assist the Order in rooting out the Sith Lords within the baseball power structure, it is essential that the Order owns a baseball team all to our own"

"Who, inside the Order, can bankroll a baseball team? Of course, the higher the level, the better, but buying even the most struggling baseball team in Galaxy League Baseball is beyond the Order's budget…"

Nazarie is probably referring to one of the top-level teams, since Galaxy League Baseball usually referred to the major league component of the Galactic Baseball Cartel. But how effective would a minor-league team in detecting Sith Lords? Would a Jedi-owned team be Sith Lord bait? These were the kinds of issues that needed to be resolved before the Jedi Council issues a call for bids to purchase baseball teams. Plus, according to the Jedi Code, a professional baseball team is considered a business and hence anyone wishing to tender a bid within the Order for a baseball team must have passed the Trials of Knighthood.

"Ugohr is the one who I would agree to provide financing to for that purpose. If there is one Jedi I could trust to run a baseball team, that would be him. He knows baseball better than anyone" the female Togruta comments.

"He has one trial left to go, and then he is more than welcome to tender a bid to purchase a baseball team in the Order's behalf, if only a minor-league one"

"In deep meditation he is. Facing the mirror"

"May the Force be with him" Lavak tells the rest of the Council.

Ugohr has surrounded himself with candles made of 100% pure eco-wax inside his tent. Of course, Praesitlyn is not like Kashyyyk or Endor as far as sleeping under the stars is concerned, but he almost succumbs to the temptation of sleeping under the stars. But these two planets are the best-known temperate-climate outdoors tourist traps in the galaxy, much to the dismay of the Wookies and the Ewoks respectively. No more than Praesitlyn ranks among the top desert planets for tourism; there Geonosis, Jakku and Tatooine take the cake. But he finds that eco-wax produced on Praesitlyn itself is rather smelly, at least upon burning. His first set of Force-visions involves a never-ending sequence of conflicts, each of which involves baseball on some level. He is seen inside Stalgasin Memorial Stadium where he duels Kishuna to the death for the control of Galaxy League Baseball.

"Up next: the duel of the year: Darth Ugohr vs Kishuna!" Charzon screams through the PA system at Stalgasin, while Ugohr and Kishuna get ready to enter the baseball diamond, from the third base and first base respectively.

Fats is then in charge of the music inside the stadium, and is a lot slimmer than she used to be, and marks the beginning of the duel by playing Dark Side of the Force by Binks Floyd.

"Yousa want a grand display of yousa fighten ability, mesa will give yousa una for da ages" he tells Kishuna while using Force lightning to pin him to the ground, before he could even fire a shot of his sonic blaster.

Once Ugohr closes towards him, he simply Force-chokes Kishuna, "Mesa find yousa lack of decisiveness disturbin, wesa will rule over da Galaxy League Baseball together" One quick motion of a red-bladed crossguard lightsaber and Kishuna dies on the ground. Ugohr stands triumphantly on Kishuna's corpse that was severed in two, with Charzon bringing the flag of Galaxy League Baseball for Ugohr to plant on Kishuna as if he was the base of a flagpole. But then the Geonosian crowd jeered at him, hurling insults such as:

"You just made us slaves of the dark side of the Force!"

"Down with the Gungans!"

He made a lot of enemies for himself because of his attempt at taking control of the baseball world in this Force-vision. He will be hated all across Geonosis and he will simply be perpetuating the Baseball Wars yet another step, and embroil the galaxy in yet more costly and deadly ground warfare by criminal elements. The next step in this vision sees him inside the main audience chamber of Stalgasin Memorial Stadium, where he has built an iron throne with red spikes protruding from the throne's back in his office as the Commissioner of Galaxy League Baseball. He is having an audience with a few other general managers of Galaxy League Baseball teams, with the Butcher of Praesitlyn, now the GM of the Praesitlyn Cardinals, in the lead.

"Butcher of Praesitlyn, yousa go forth and taken Neimoidia for Galaxy League Baseball! No quarter! Kill all Neimoidians you can find around the stadium, even if theysa no deal in baseball!"

"I'll land as close as possible to the stadium so as to limit the bloodshed, sir"

Ouch! Ugohr is thus portrayed as a psychopath that would not hesitate to kill all the Neimoidians on a planet just because they can mount a resistance upon capturing Neimoidia, in effect almost wiping out the Neimoidians in the long run. But Ugohr had a glimpse of what happens if he turned to the dark side of the Force: there would be no peace in the baseball world and he would bring baseball to the brink of destruction. Once the last of the six candles have burned in full, he could consider the Trial of Spirit over.

"Issa horrible! Mesa not want to become a psychopath mass murderer!"

"You have seen what would happen to you if you fall to the dark side of the Force. In the meantime, if you receive authorization to own a baseball team, you know you passed this Trial"

"Ownen a baseball team issa big responsibility, mesa berry well placed to manage a baseball team"

He knew the price ranges of baseball teams as Nazarie does. They both think that the cost-effectiveness of owning a baseball team for the Order depended greatly on the level of the team owned by the Order. But they both knew that, especially post-Praesitlyn, the Jedi are _persona non grata_ in the Neimoidian business of baseball, so their only option is to buy a Cartel-affiliated team. Wait… they are receiving a transmission from the Jedi Council regarding Ugohr and his future within the Jedi Order, as well as regarding his future trajectory in baseball:

"The Jedi Council hereby confers on Ugohr Poof the rank of Jedi Knight, with all the privileges, duties and responsibilities thereto appertaining. He may now take a Padawan learner and, in the current context, own a business, namely a…" Lennart announces.

"BASEBALL TEAM!" Nazarie screamed. Galaxy League Baseball also granted authorization to the Order to buy a team at any level…"

"Wait a minute, Master Nazarie, are you telling me that the Galactic Baseball Cartel has now become Galaxy League Baseball? I thought Galaxy League Baseball was associated with the top level of baseball, regardless of affiliation!" a confused Garam asked the Council in the dead of night.

"Yes. Now I must warn you: Galaxy League Baseball will not allow Jedi to directly own more than one team. Most bids submitted by Jedi to buy baseball teams were made by Jedi who, while they may have expertise in other areas that are useful to fight the One Sith, their knowledge of the baseball business may be… unsatisfactory. At the same time, Ugohr and you are those who, among the Order, know best about baseball. You are more than welcome to place a bid if you want to"

"Ther-sa preferences about da successful bid other than knowledge of baseball business on da bidden's part?"

"It has to offer a cost-effective way to fight the One Sith within the baseball industry. You have realized by now that the curve of cost-effectiveness vs the team level has an inverted U-shape"

But effectiveness alone is like a parabola at first and then a straight line. Cost, on the other hand, was another can of worms. As Nazarie and Ugohr know, Rookie and D-level teams can be had for as little as a few hundred thousand credits. Even the Christophsis Rays or the Kashyyyk Giants, which are the teams struggling the most financially at the major league level, are still worth hundreds of millions of credits. Plus the Kashyyyk government will block any attempt to sell controlling stakes in the team to non-Wookies. Even as they climb as low as the C-level, team prices in the seven figures are not uncommon: the last C-level team sold, the Whiforla 11 Rancors, was sold to the Kadavo government for 1 million credits flat, but they have yet to build a ballpark to relocate the baseball team in it.

"Wesa cannot afford to keep a low profile anymore. Wesa need to buy as high a level of team as wesa can"

"What's your budget like? There is a need for a press conference on Coruscant in the Jedi Temple regarding the baseball crisis"

"25 million credits"

AA-level teams can sometimes fetch eight-figure prices, sometimes even as high as the high-teens, although not as often as AAA-level teams. But even the most expensive AAA-level team isn't nearly as expensive as the estimated price of the Christophsis Rays. And even so, for the same cost, it would be subject to debate whether the value lies in whether to be close to Neimoidian turf or to be closer to the Geonosian-controlled core worlds of baseball (Praesitlyn, Geonosis); for combat purposes, the baseball contents of the team almost don't matter.

"25 million credits! You can virtually win the Order's bid to own a baseball team! You are to proceed, alongside your master, to all speed to Coruscant"


	15. Chapter 14: Baseball Team Ownership

**Chapter 14: Baseball team ownership**

After flying all the way from Praesitlyn due to Order business, Ugohr enters the dimly-lit High Council chamber, where all Councillors present on Coruscant are, hooded and with their lightsabers ready to ignite, even though he was _de facto_ considered as a full-fledged Jedi Knight, he still needed the knighting ceremony, with Lennart, the Grand Master of the Order, at the center of the circle arc. Ugohr is thus dubbed as a Jedi Knight and, because Gungans do not have hair, there is no Padawan braid involved.

"Now that mesa a Jedi Knight, mesa have the right to own a business. Mesa not spend the money earned back on Lorimax… until today! Mesa have the intention to buy a baseball team at the AA or AAA level"

"And you are also entitled to a Padawan learner" Nazarie reminds him. "Here is a selection of prospective Padawans interested in playing baseball. I'll warn you immediately, most of these Padawans are going to be batters. Lightsaber training makes Padawans much more likely to excel as batters than as pitchers."

"The winner of the Jedi Order's deed to the ownership of its baseball team is… Ugohr Poof! He meets all the qualifications we have set forward to owning a team"

Now that the One Sith is aware that the Jedi Order is backing the Geonosian-controlled Galaxy League Baseball, Ugohr can overtly own a professional baseball team that is a party to the conflict. He had a 25-million budget with which to carry out his operation. He could buy almost any AA-level team he wants, so long as the AA-level team is a team in Geonosian-held territory. Or a struggling AAA-level franchise; oftentimes wealthy Geonosians, individuals or corporations, owned baseball teams. But he was looking through the files of each AA or AAA-level team that may be targeted by an acquisition, either solicited or not.

"Hmm… the Naboo Dodgers seem interesting AAA team to own; theysa want a Naboo-native to own the team. But the Dagobah Bogwings issa actively seeken new ownership"

Understandably, each side in the conflict is wary if the team is bought by a Force-sensitive individual, or a corporation that had significant Force-sensitive leadership; the Neimoidian Baseball League explicitly forbids light-sided Force-sensitive entities from buying teams, while Galaxy League Baseball applies a similar rule, but aimed at dark-sided Force-sensitive entities. And, of course, the Order has to weigh the possible revenues against the expenditures: owning costs, payroll and otherwise. Because, even though the Order let Ugohr purchase a baseball team for strategic reasons, they still have to show for it in business terms.

"Da Dagobah Bogwings need repairs to da stadium; any new owner needs to get some financing to repair it. Mesa thinks dat a derelict stadium will be of no use to the One Sith, but the Naboo stadium issa bombad condition. Theysa play in Otoh Gunga"

The particularity is that the Naboo Dodgers seem to have a mostly Gungan-filled bullpen, whereas the infield is about half Gungan, half other species, mostly human, but the outfield is entirely Geonosian. However, Otoh Gunga's Gulliball Stadium was famous to have a rather low dome (and fences) and a small foul zone, where teams with flightless outfielders can still hope to win, thanks to the short distances from home plate to the outfield fences. In that sense, it is the anathema to Stalgasin, which was almost the textbook definition of a pitcher's park.

"Open a channel to da owner of da Naboo Dodgers"

The owner of the Naboo Dodgers lived in a Geonosian hive. The Geonosian was an elderly aristocrat that couldn't fly anymore but indulged in clothing that would fit near-Humans his size rather than Geonosians, and he was dressed with a black tuxedo with yellow trim. He seemed a little disturbed to be a talking to Jedi, especially post-Praesitlyn; Ugohr could feel in the Force that the Declaration of Praesitlyn changed everything in the relationship he had with Jedi and Force-sensitives in general, and not the least in how armed conflict between Force-sensitives shaped the relationship he had with baseball.

"Channel open"

"Greetings, Gungan. What business does the Jedi Order have with me today? I have little patience with Jedi at this time"

"Mesa Ugohr Poof and mesa win da Jedi Order's right of purchasing una baseball team: oursa contract with Galaxy League Baseball stated that wesa could possess una baseball team"

"The Naboo government promised to buy a stake in the team if a Naboo native bought controlling shares in the team, natives from the moons included. Take it up with Her Majesty"

"Yousa not want to disappoint Hisa Grace, Duke Commissioner Kishuna, and wesa were given permission to buy a baseball as a token of gratitude from hisa part"

"How would His Grace show gratitude towards the Jedi when the Jedi caused us to fight the Neimoidians over baseball? That's ridiculous!"

"If yousa sell the team, yousa will no longer be embroiled in baseball warfare"

"I will have to consult with the board of trustees of the team upon receiving the bid. This is most unexpected"

The Queen promised to bring the Naboo Dodgers back as Naboo property during her reign as an electoral promise. The investment banking arm of the Naboo government, the Royal Bank of Naboo, needed to be consulted before any purchase would proceed, in accordance with the electoral promise, because Her Majesty didn't promise that the team would be _nationalized_ , just returned back to a Naboo native. Upon contacting the mergers and acquisitions department of the Royal Bank of Naboo, Ugohr is joining what he thought to be the relevant service.

"Royal Bank of Naboo. What can I do for you?"

"Mesa Ugohr Poof, a newly dubbed Jedi Knight in possession of da Jedi Order's deed of ownership to itsa baseball team. Mesa not usen da deed yet, but mesa buyin' the Naboo Dodgers from Geonosian hands on behalf of da Jedi Order"

"Gungans… please tell me that the Jedi Order will own the team in name only!"

"Mesa will be public face of da team's ownership; them-sa only interested in pastin' da One Sith"

"The Jedi are using you and the team to fight the Sith? Why the hell do baseball have anything to do with wars between Force-sensitives?"

"Da Declaration of Praesitlyn force da hand of many baseball teams. No planet with baseball teams issa truly safe anymore"

"Oh yes, the Declaration of Praesitlyn. Basically a declaration of war of Galaxy League Baseball on the One Sith. Forgive me, I am not familiar with the Baseball Wars theaters; which side is Naboo on"

"Naboo issa affiliated with Galaxy League Baseball"

"That… I do not know what to make of it"

"Hersa Majesty will fulfill dat promise. Mesa have 20 million moolah to invest in da team"

"For 20 million you have roughly 65% stake in the team and the Naboo government will buy the remaining 35%; I believe that agreement to be most beneficial to all parties"

Nazarie is stunned by the move the Royal Bank of Naboo is about to make. The Naboo Dodgers were not worth 30 million, and never in the craziest Force-visions would she think that an AAA-level team would be worth that much. She was the resident baseball expert among the Jedi Council and she was reporting to the Senate about the business of baseball, as well as their criminal implications, after all. But it was hard to tell whether the Geonosians would swallow their pride and accept their team to be bought for 30 million or demand a higher amount; if the latter, that would force the Royal Bank of Naboo to invest more in the project.

"It would require us to create a separate entity in which the ownership stakes are split between you and the Bank. Just fill out this form and you may go out on your merry way to buy the team"

Paperwork… registering a company is actually fairly simple under Naboo regulations of the day. The company, Gungan Baseball and Entertainment, would be mostly Gungan-held, thanks to Ugohr, but ownership does not imply that the day-to-day decisions regarding the team will be his to make. Stakeholders need to individually sign so long as they have a minimum stake (under Naboo law, that minimum stake was 5%) in the company so created. Since the holding company is mostly a shell company whose only real non-fiscal obligations are to Galaxy League Baseball…

"Now, regarding the administration of Gungan Baseball and Entertainment, this company is essentially a shell, which can be administered concurrently with the team. The CEO of the team is the same as that of GBE, will you agree to that?"

"Yesa. However, da general manager, vice president of baseball operations, will not take part in GBE operations"

"Oh, I received a communiqué from Otoh Gunga. The Gungan government is also interested in buying a stake in the team, which will make your stake lowered to 51%. They have recently passed a resolution to help buy the team away from the Geonosians"

"Greetings, Naboo bankers. Mesa Rep Birks, and mesa responsible for da moolah of Otoh Gunga. Gungans investen in da city's baseball team. Da One Sith interesen in the Gungan team, wesa need urgent help!"

"The One Sith, interested in the team? We must act quickly!"

"Ex-squeeze me, but da Gulliball Stadium issa Gungan property and wesa need to be consulted before da team is bought back" Birks told the banker.

"Wesa need to hurry before da One Sith buys the team! Mesa buyen 51% of da team, and yousa split 49% as yousa see fit"

"Da Geonosians will not refuse 40 million moolah for an AAA-level baseball team!"

The three people finally get along: the Royal Bank of Naboo and Otoh Gunga Sports Authority buy 24.5% each for 10 million apiece, and Ugohr would buy 51% at 20 million. The banker drafts a memorandum of understanding for buying the Naboo Dodgers from Count Sun Rit, which he signs first and the other two Gungans agree to. Naboo had two baseball teams under Galaxy League Baseball's jurisdiction. The C-level team, the Naboo Amphibians, was the other, playing in 6000-seat Paitnnu Stadium, in the city of Moenia and thus played in front of not only Gungans but also non-Gungans, whereas the Dodgers attracted a mostly Gungan crowd, despite playing at a higher level. Seems like the Gungans are more fond of baseball than the non-Gungans on Naboo, very few of which being Neimoidian or Geonosian.

"However, do the Gungans also want to transfer the C-level team, playing in Paitnnu Stadium, in Moenia, into Gungan Baseball and Entertainment?"

"Yesa. Issa maken administration of duey baseball teams muy easier"

"Please ex-squeeze mesa, but mesa have a call to make to Galaxy League Baseball"

After all the Otoh Gunga Sports Authority also owned the Naboo Amphibians… now the question hanging over the head of Ugohr was that whether owning 51% of Gungan Baseball and Entertainment which itself owned both Naboo baseball teams, would mean that he violated the agreement with the Jedi Order and Galaxy League Baseball had? For that he had to ask the Galaxy League Baseball head office before the transaction could proceed. He had to open a channel to the Geonosis offices of Galaxy League Baseball, and he managed to contact the personal assistant to the head of mergers and acquisitions, a Geonosian ex-elite soldier.

"What can I do for you today?"

"Mesa Ugohr Poof and mesa have a question. Wesa in da process of creating a holding company that will formally own da Naboo Dodgers once the transaction is approved. But mesa will hold only 51% of da joint company; another stakeholder already owns a team and itsa plannen to incorporate da other team into da holding company. Will mesa violate the agreement with the Jedi Order?"

"The agreement with the Jedi Order only stated that they could own one team at each level. Unfortunately the order took it to mean that only one team total could be bought. Since Otoh Gunga Sports Authority already owns 100% of a C-level team, and you're about to purchase an AAA-level team on behalf of the Order, you would not be violating the agreement"

"Okiedokie"

With that answer in hand, Ugohr promptly returns to the channel opened to the Royal Bank of Naboo. The other Gungan, representing Otoh Gunga Sports Authority, was growing restless, awaiting Galaxy League Baseball's answer. Otherwise it was a pretty standard transaction that the only one left with any authority to block it would be the current owner.

"Mesa not violate the agreement with da Jedi Order by having a 51% stake in two teams at different levels, even if said teams were ultimately recruiting players one another"

"But having a holdings company to park the money to buy the team in it is not enough to buy the team! Who is the current owner?"

"Count Sun Rit"

"If he's out of the baseball game of thrones, that's one less Geonosian hive to deal with"

"Correction: una less aristocrat to deal with. An aristocrat losin a baseball team issa quickly disgracen"

Clearly baseball was also at the core of inter-hive business rivalries among Geonosians. Stalgasin Hive owned both the Geonosis and the Stalgasin Memorial Stadium; Duke Kishuna was appointed by the leader of the Stalgasin Hive to lead Galaxy League Baseball. Geonosian Dukes often wrest control of major-league baseball teams through intrigue, whereas Counts or Marquesses would often own baseball teams at the AA or AAA-level, as if court ranks were an indication of baseball purchasing power. But once the two Gungans put their respective signatures on the charter officialising the creation of Gungan Baseball and Entertainment, the Geonosian count is in for a nasty surprise from Naboo and the other members of the board of trustees as well. Once Sun Rit receives the offer from Gungan Baseball and Entertainment, he convenes a holoconference with the other members of the Board of Trustees to discuss the Gungan offer of buying the team away…

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Gungans claim that buying the team away from us will make us disappear from the One Sith radar… and they are most generous by AAA-level team standards: 40 million credits. Is safety from the One Sith worth a 40-million bribe from the Jedi?"

"We must prepare the press release. Sun Rit was a bad owner for the baseball team, he planned on taking the team out of Naboo even though there was no financial hardship or lack of following" the first trustee said, rather wryly.

"It behooves us to say that Sun Rit managed to be hated by the customer base of the team, and that all of a sudden, poof! The Gungans have the audacity to buy the team from us!" another Geonosian aristocrat told the other trustees.

"We must be wary of the Jedi: they may have a trick up their sleeve" a third trustee warned.

"The One Sith is everywhere at the highest levels of baseball! We don't want wars between Force-sensitives to ruin our way of life here!" the last trustee vehemently ranted about the situation.

And the debate rages on for hours between the four outside trustees, trying to convince the owner that selling the team is best for the team's interests, or, alternatively, that keeping the team is best for the hive. And the debate was rather heated as is usually the case for demented Geonosians. But the outcome of the vote is made clear to the Jedi Council once the vote that follows these endless hours of sterile debates over baseball and their relationship to the wars between Force-users is over.

"By now you realize that the One Sith is everywhere at the highest levels of baseball. The other trustees convinced me that Ugohr is the Force's gift to the baseball industry, and would make a better owner than I am. For this reason we have agreed, by a 3-2 vote, that we shall sell the Naboo Dodgers to him"


	16. Epilogue: Of ATSes and baseball

**Epilogue: Of applicant tracking systems and baseball**

Now that Ugohr was officially the majority owner of the Naboo Dodgers and the Naboo Amphibians, through his 51% stake in Gungan Baseball and Entertainment which, in turn, owned 100% of both teams, he could now concentrate in taking a Padawan, knowing that he could neither run a holding that owned baseball teams nor fight the One Sith without one. Because taking Padawans was, from the Order's standpoint, much like a standard HR (because there were hordes of non-Humans, HR was only retained as an initialism by the Jedi Order referring to personnel decisions) process for the non-Force-using Jedi Temple staff, Ugohr's first reflex was to go over the applicant tracking software. He never used it on the recruiter side, and HR was far from his strong suit. Upon authenticating himself in the HR station, located inside the northeast tower of the Jedi Temple, he seemed a little lost, but he started with the keyword interface.

All people who passed the initiate trials were to fill out a form, oh wait, the final stage of the initiate trials involved filling out the form that so many among non-Force-sensitive Jedi Temple staff likened to a "résumé black hole". Since he was the owner of a baseball team, Ugohr inputs into the system "baseball" as a keyword, returning about a dozen hits. Then he refined his search to include all nine positions: the basemen, the catcher, shortstop, the outfielders, pitcher, no return. He tried also looking further into the entries that contained baseball among the crop of new possible apprentices.

"Da Force no issa with mesa today… da system no liken baseball players"

"Perhaps you should use their lightsaber training scores as a proxy for their current batting skill!" a non-Force-sensitive HR employee told Ugohr.

"Actually only lightsaber-on-blaster would matter for batting"

"You should get some PeopleSoft training if you want to sit on the Council of Reassignment"

"Mesa no desire to sit on da Council of Reassignment"

Only the Council of Reassignment needed formal training in the tools of HR among the ranking members of the Jedi Order; most HR work was handled by the non-Force-sensitives. Not even the High Council had any real need for that, and by and large, to someone outside the purview of the Service Corps or the Jedi Temple staff, a Jedi has sparse need for HR training at best. Probably those who cycle through Padawans quickly would need to have some basic grounding in HR, though. Ugohr took notes of who he would need to submit to testing of his own choice.

"Mesa find da HR mackineek to be… useless for takin Padawans. Mesa have another idea: since mesa expect da Baseball Wars to last for years, mesa want to find out who can play baseball best"

"The applicant tracking system not without flaws, but it makes sorting résumés easier for us before we interview any of them"

"Mesa have no choice; mesa have to test prospective Padawans myself, according to criteria of my choice"

He then proceeds to message all seven of the prospective Padawans, one of which has passed the Trials years ago but is officially a member of the MedCorps assigned to Cato Neimoidia, which means that this particular person had not found a Master to take him/her on by age 13. The only one that wasn't in the Temple at the time was, well, the MedCorps person. And the MedCorps is like the other three service corps of the Order, namely the EduCorps, the ExpoCorps and the AgriCorps: most people who joined were there because they either failed the Initiate Trials or they couldn't get a Master to supervise their training in time.

"Quick, Charzon. Mesa need yousa to prepare the pitchin mackineek and to finden a suitable park to hold a Combine"

"Nine player-sized targets, one pitching machine, police radar and a target grid, got it. But why do you want to administer a Combine on Coruscant?"

"Because mesa want to take a Padawan and da HR mackineek issa useless for takin Padawans. Also, because mesa expecten da Baseball Wars to last for years, mesa want a Padawan that can undertake baseball-related missions and to be able to play baseball as a cover for such missions"

"All right, Master Poof, you're the boss here"

"Master Poof, where are we headed?" the younglings ask.

"Yousa takin da Baseball Combine in Invisible Hand Park. Da best baseball player will be mesa Padawan learner"

"I guess I can't argue with a baseball team owner" a male Iktochi told Ugohr.

Because he was dealing with 12-year-olds, the events may be the same as he was subjected to for entry into the Lorimax Baseball Camp, but the standards are assuredly different, that is, if he wanted a single administration for all seven prospective Padawans. Administering a Combine at a different level for that particular student compared to everyone else is twice the work but not doing it would confer an unfair advantage to that particular student. Administering the Combine, for all Galaxy League Baseball intents and purposes, was the same as trying to ascertain whether a player could become a professional, and Galaxy League Baseball usually administered the Combine to high school-aged players.

And, for this trip to Invisible Hand Park, Ugohr and Charzon wore the jerseys of their respective professional teams: for Ugohr, the Naboo Dodgers, of which he owned 51% by virtue of owning 51% of Gungan Baseball and Entertainment and, for Charzon, the Cato Neimoidia jersey she wore as a ballgirl before the stadium was destroyed. As the Combine administrators, they were dressed as such while everyone else was in Jedi robes. Invisible Hand Park being in an abandoned district where the Invisible Hand crashed many centuries ago, they could have the park's baseball diamond all to themselves, with the younglings on the upper deck of the double-decker _Pullman_ and the equipment below.

"Charzon, yousa position da pitchin mackineek on da mound" Ugohr told Charzon before turning to the younglings. "Yousa stay in da dugout until da pitchin mackineek issa ready, and then wesa go over da rules and da events of da Combine"

"I'm the umpire, too…" Charzon commented while going behind home plate.

"Younglings, today issa yousa chance to play da best baseball yousa ever played. Mesa own a baseball team; if yousa play well enough to be mesa Padawan, yousa may be called upon to play at a pro level. Yousa pass from da youngest to da oldest, and yousa can use da Force only for fieldin and catchin"

Charzon draws foul lines and outfield fencing with chalk before the home run derby could begin. Of course, she could expect to have to re-do the lines after the Homr Run derby ends. As with when they took it for themselves, the seven would-be Padawans are entitled to three outs with the right hand and three more with the left hand, with Charzon using the same sequence of pitches as she was subjected to herself, or at least as far as she can remember, while she have the controls of the pitching machine. Clearly the Iktochi and the Mirialan are the best-positioned at the beginning of this event, scoring two early home runs with the flyball at 25 meters per second and the breaking ball at 35.

"Hey, batter, batter! Hey, batter, batter!" the Iktochi screams when the Firrerreo apprentice steps forward.

"You're too fat to play baseball!"

"Too fat to be playing baseball? Perhaps your best bet is a Master that produces Consulars; Ugohr is clearly more of a Sentinel type" the Twi'lek youngling told the Mirialan.

And an Investigator or Shadow one at that; there is a fine line between the two. Oh, the old categories and subcategories as outlined in _The Jedi Path_ … A personality test based on that is embedded in the applicant tracking system so that every single person seeking non-Force-using work at the behest of the Jedi Order has to take the same personality test as Jedi Younglings, irrespective of position sought. The HR people at the Jedi Temple would usually consider personality fit and qualifications before forwarding a new job posting to a retuning job applicant.

Meanwhile, it took seven pitches for the first youngling to get three outs. Actually three younglings were eliminated from the running after the seventh pitch. These younglings were Ewok, Jawa and Duros. But the Mirialan held on, alongside the Twi'lek, both batting multiple home runs between outs, even with the pitches being thrown, as the administrator of the Lorimax camp told them, at the level of a first professional callup in what is now the Rookie or D-levels of Galaxy League Baseball. And the Mirialan lady seemed to do well enough for herself.

"May da Force be with yousa. Da winner is…" Ugohr told the assembled younglings, pointing at the Mirialan before Charzon positions herself in catcher gear behind the target grid.

In the galactic hierarchy of baseball, Mirialans seem to be slotted side-by-side with the Gungans and the Wookies; not a race that were willing to go beyond their homeworlds to establish baseball-related businesses but they can be fiercely territorial when it comes to conducting baseball on their respective homeworlds. And man can they supply players to the major leagues if properly groomed from high school. Precision pitching was, unlike the home run derby, an event for the Duros to dominate, since he was the only one to hit all seven targets. Even the Mirialan did not hit all seven balls, only managing to hit six of them when she came up.

"What kind of player would Ugohr want, a batter or a pitcher?" the Ewok asked.

"If my information on Galaxy League Baseball entry-level training camps is correct, pitching has two events and batting takes up everything else"

"Gungans fill up the entire bullpen of both of Ugohr's teams. They want a backup batter most likely" the Jawa commented.

"Infield, outfield?" the Firrerreo asked.

Even though, at the Rookie and D-levels, a player could hope to play at right field without requiring much in the way of defensive skills, at the C-level, the players needed at least some defensive foundation to survive even at right field. That being said, Ugohr knew very little about the batting needs of the Amphibians, so he couldn't tell whether he needed an infielder or an outfielder in the near future for the Amphibians, knowing that the Jawa's statement is correct. Speaking of which he had to use Force agility to make it through the third event, fielding. And the Firrerreo lacked agility, too.

"Mesa only see una possible use for dat Firrerreo as a baseball player: a power pitcher"

"But the Duros is more accurate!" the Jawa screams, in protest.

Ugohr had a Force-vision of that Mirialan saying " _I'm too fat to…_ " with multiple suffixes like _be a bounty hunter_ , _be an exotic dancer_ , and a number of things she claims to be too fat for, but other Near-Humans and humanoid species with that morphology would do any of the stuff she listed just fine. But that Mirialan did catch all the third event balls just fine, proving a competent infielder in that capacity. The Jawa and the Ewok both step forward at the end of the third round, with a joint announcement to make about the process that led them to consider having Ugohr take either of them on as a Padawan learner.

"Due to irreconcilable differences between us and the prospective master, Ugohr Poof, we hereby withdraw from consideration"

With only five younglings left, the remaining five events of the Combine are going to be individually a little shorter. In the end, it's painfully obvious the Duros and the Firrerreo are both best used as pitchers, because they both dominate the power pitching event. They can throw the fastball as hard as 40 meters per second, which is impressive in the context of pitchers their age, which not even the much older Mirialan was able to do. Everyone else is left in the dust: it's clear to Ugohr that the Twi'lek and the Iktochi are not suited for pitching at all.

"Yousa halfway through: ther-sa foosa events left and yousa fife younglings still considered"

Compared to the original version of the Combine as conducted by the Neimoidian Baseball League, Ugohr reversed the order of the infield catching and the power pitching. From the here on out the Firrerreo and the Duros both feel more or less uncomfortable because clearly they are both made to become pitchers. They take much longer than the other three to catch even in the infield. However that event was where the Mirialan has everybody else beat by a rather wide margin. And infield fielding, too. Nevertheless, the outfield events are not her cup of tea. These were events for the Duros to dominate, especially at left field.

The Combine administrators announce the final event, with the five remaining younglings being visibly tired by that point and the makeshift baseball diamond getting dark. While the administrators re-draw the lines of the impromptu diamond…

"For da final event, all-n-youse start from home plate, and run around all foosa bases, with da finish line also at home plate"

Charzon had the finish line placed with the pitching machine because the pitching machine is equipped with telemetry equipment – after all, telemetry does matter so as to ensure the balls actually go out at the intended speed. And she shoots a blaster shot in the air, set to stun mode, to signify the start of the race around the baseball diamond's infield. And, while the Iktochi is off to a great start, the Iktochi is quickly overtaken by everyone else after they make it to first base. With the Firrerreo and the Mirialan in the lead, the two run as if the race would be able to determine, in the aggregate, who Ugohr will take, and they keep the race close, even though, more than the position, it's the time that seems to be of interest to the Combine administrators.

"If yousa have complaints with how da Combine was administered, please, tell mesa so that mesa make da Combine better in da future"

But because the test he just administered was based on the Combine as administered by the professional baseball leagues, any modification must be weighed against the purpose of the Combine. Assessing baseball players was the primary aim of the Combine, and Ugohr could sense the frustrations of the younglings still in the running for the Padawan position. With the five younglings, it was rather quick to determine which one would be best suited for what role on the diamond, and whether he could afford to stash the Padawan in a C-level team.

"Mesa decision is final: mesa take Fats Loulan as mesa Padawan learner. Shesa more polished, as a baseball player and as a Jedi brute, than anyone else in da group"

"Fats, a Force-sensitive? All I ever see her use the Force for was for hypnosis, and it's often as a variation of I'm too fat for something. Like Jar Jar Binks, she was a poorly-rounded, poorly-trained Force-user" Charzon commented.

While it is true that Jar Jar Binks had little, if any, formal training in the Force, he leaned towards the dark side. But Jedi historians are baffled as to why Jar Jar wasn't trained in the ways of the Force: some say that proper detection mechanisms evaded Gungans until after the Battle of Naboo, while others claim that he was deemed unsuitable for Jedi training from the very start. These accounts fail to take into account post-Darth Maul, and why Darth Sidious didn't want to train Jar Jar as a Sith Lord in the wake of Darth Maul's apparent death.

"Shesa say all too often that shesa too fat for many things. But shesa just fine as a Jedi brute"

That one role requiring actually fairly little in the ways of Force skill. Mind tricks are useful when using a Jedi brute in a policing role, though, despite having little to no skill in using Force agility whatsoever. Plus brutes usually have more lightsaber combat skill than they have with the Force.


End file.
